“You Know You Want It”: Bret Michaels’ Dance Song is the Best Thing Ever

I have no idea what our old friend Gary Suarez was doing on the digital graveyard that is MySpace, but thank Christ he was — ’cause he found “You Know You Want It,” an electronic dance song by Poison’s Bret Michaels.

Yes, you read that correctly. “An electronic dance song by Poison’s Bret Michaels.” Yes, it is as gut-bustingly horrible as you’d assume it would be.

The craziest part is, even though the above single art looks bootleg as fuck, this is apparently 100% real. Remember that album Bret is making where he records a bunch of covers with a bunch of famous friends? So yeah this is gonna be on that album. (But why the fuck was it unveiled on MySpace, with zero fanfare?) Either that, or someone is really pulling off a tremendous troll here — ’cause that not only sounds just like Bret Michaels, but the lyrics seem just like the kind of crap he’d write, too:

You know you want it
You know you want it
You know you get it
So you got it
So you flaunt it
So back up on it

Holy shit. You absolutely MUST listen to this.

You can also download it on Amazon if you wanna crank it at your next party.