...And F*ck You Too

Korn’s Jonathan Davis Joins the Dave Mustaine/Ted Nugent Conservative Nutcase Alliance

0

SPECTRE Mustaine Nugent DavisBREAKING: Korn vocalist and prominent media analyst Jonathan Davis is a moron.

According to Blabbermouth, Mr. Davis recently appeared on conservative conspiracy theorist Alex Jones’ talk show, where he declared that “For a long time, I’ve been into what’s going on with our country,” the way someone might say that “I’ve been into Gojira for a long time,” before making the following important announcement:

“I think [Barack Obama is] an Illuminati puppet. It just doesn’t make sense, the whole thing. The guy comes from out of nowhere, he gets made president, all this stuff starts happening. I don’t know… It just didn’t make sense to me. And to top top it off, I’m not really a political person, I don’t know much about it, I’m just worried about my privacy and my children’s privacy. This being America, we’re supposed to be the ‘land of the free,’ and it’s becoming a police state.

“I just want us to become the country we used to be. I remember, when I was a kid, how amazing our country was, and as I’ve grown up and watched things happen, I just want it to be like it used to be.”

This, of course, is total Munky shit. Even if you don’t like Obama’s politics — and you’re certainly entitled not to — to say America is “becoming a police state” is to demonstrate an almost total ignorance as to what an actual police state is like. When Barack Obama sends one of your relatives to a prison camp in Siberia for daring to say something negative about him, then you cans start throwing around phrases like “police state.” In the meantime, the mere fact that Alex Jones’ talk show exists proves that free speech still exists.

Also, an Illuminati puppet? Seriously, bruh? I mean, are you sure it’s the Illuminati? How do you know it’s not the Freemasons or Cobra or Hydra or SMERSH? Obama seems like a real SMERSH man to me.

I guess Davis comes off better than Nugent or Mustaine usually do, if only because he doesn’t say anything overtly racist or homophobic. So… yay! Jonathan Davis wins the Special Olympics!

Here’s the video of Davis’ appearance on the program:

Metal Sucks Greatest Hits