Everyone's Replaceable

Keri Kelli Continues His Quest to Play with Every 80s Band Ever, Joins Night Ranger

  • Axl Rosenberg

Keri KelliIn the early aughts, Vince and I had something of a collective mancrush/obsession with Keri Kelli. For one thing, he’s a badass guitar player. For another thing, he’s like the Kevin Talley of cock rock: he’s been a member of basically every 80s band ever. I’m only half-joking: at one point or another, he has played with (deep breath) Alice Cooper (not exclusively an 80s artist but still!), Vince Neil, Skid Row, Ratt, Warrant, Slash’s Snakepit, Adler’s Appetite, Love/Hate, The Newlydeads, Pretty Boy Floyd, and Dad’s Porno Mag. And that’s just off the top of my head. Dude has been in so many bands that when I once joked he was joining Geoff Tate’s version of Queensrÿche, a rumor quickly spread that he actually was joining Geoff Tate’s version of Queensrÿche, and that seemed plausible.

While Kelli was spared the fate of having to work for the walking, talking doucheturd that is Geoff Tate, Bring Back Glam! tells me has now joined yet another band primarily known for their work in the 1980s — specifically, Night Ranger. Who I honestly had no idea were even still around. Funnier still, this is apparently the second time Kelli has been a Night Ranger, having temporarily filled-in for the band in 2012.

This marks the first time I have ever been potentially interested in seeing Night Ranger. It also makes me wonder which band Kelli will join next. Poison? Cinderella? Whichever version of L.A. Guns he wasn’t in already? I’m on the edge of my seat over here!

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