Describe Your Favorite Metal Album in Five Words


As you may or may not be aware, this week’s Most Favored Twitter Game is to describe their favorite movie in five words. So, for example, if your favorite movie is Some Kind of Monster, you need to see more movies might say “Band therapy creates shit album.” Get it? Got it? Good.

So, I thought it would be fun to try this with some metal records. I’ve provided descriptions for some particularly famous releases below (I ignored the “favorite” part in favor of “funniest,” so some of these albums are great and some are awful… but the basic concept still applies); even though this wasn’t really intended as a guessing game, making it one also seemed like it would be fun, so you’ll have to scroll a little further down to confirm the record which each phrase describes.

I encourage you to continue in the comments section. Have fun!

  1. Lars Ulrich is rich, bitches!
  2. Corn, math, open wound sex.
  3. Ooh-ah-ah-ah-ah!
  4. Trey, what were you thinking?!?
  5. Different dudes on each side.
  6. Before dreadlocks choked Chris’ brain.
  7. Dave learned nothing from Risk.
  8. When they stopped being glam.
  9. When they started being glam.
  10. Totally not a covers album.
  11. Underappreciated in its own time.
  12. Kerry, that’s not a word.
  13. The namesake of a subgenre.
  14. Actually, Greg dislikes this one.
  15. The new singer has balls.
  16. Is it pornography or art?
  17. Like Morbid Angel with whales.
  18. And then there were none.
  19. The costliest record ever made.
  20. Endless breakdowns forever breakdown endlessly.


  1. Metallica, Metallica
  2. Slipknot, Iowa
  3. Disturbed, The Sickness
  4. Morbid Angel, Illud Divinum Insanus
  5. Napalm Death, Scum
  6. Cannibal Corpse, The Bleeding
  7. Megadeth, Super Collider
  8. Pantera, Cowboys from Hell
  9. Celtic Frost, Cold Lake
  10. Avenged Sevenfold, Hail to the King
  11. At the Gates, Slaughter of the Soul
  12. Slayer, Repentless
  13. Venom, Black Metal
  14. The Dillinger Escape Plan, Miss Machine
  15. Anthrax, The Sound of White Noise
  16. Pig Destroyer, Prowler in the Yard
  17. Gojira, From Mars to Sirius
  18. Chimaira, The Age of Hell
  19. Guns N’ Roses, Chinese Democracy
  20. Basically any deathcore record.
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