Five Finger Death Punch Are Working on a Movie
Look out, Spielberg! Move over, Scorsese! Watch your fucking back, Tarantino! Five Finger Death Punch are taking over the movie biz!!!
In a new interview with Metal Hammer, guitarist Zoltan Bathory reveals that he and his bandmates are “working on a Five Finger Death Punch movie.”
Which is interesting news! Unfortunately, Bathory didn’t provide any additional details as to what the movie’s format or subject matter might be. Will it be a documentary? A biopic? A fictional story centered around the band? There are a lot of possibilities about which we can speculate!
To that end, here are just some of the potential types of movies Five Finger Death Punch could make:
A Standard Biopic
FFDP are roughly thirteen years into their career, which sounds like a long time, but really isn’t by biopic standards. So while it’s possible the band are planning what would ostensibly be their own The Dirt, it doesn’t seem all that likely at this point.
A Concert Film
On the one hand, this seems like the most plausible possibility. On the other hand, it seems unlikely that Bathory would have said “a movie” if this is what he meant, because “a movie” implies something a little more, uh, movie-like.
One of the Band Members’ Directorial Debuts
Is a member of FFDP looking the join the ranks of Rob Zombie, Fred Durst, and Shawn “Clown” Crahan? None of them have any music video directing credits, which all of the aforementioned musicians-turned-directors did prior to making their fist feature. So this possibility also seems unlikely. Having said that, weirder things have happened…
A Some Kind of Monster-Esque Documentary
This is also totally plausible. Again, you hafta wonder if Bathory wouldn’t have said “a documentary” instead of “a movie” if this is what he meant. But he wouldn’t technically be lying or whatever if it turned out to be a doc.
A Through the Never-Esque Confusing Waste of Time
Errr… hopefully everyone learned their lesson from this debacle and we can rule out FFDP going down a similar path.
A Remake of 1972’s Five Fingers of Death Starring the Band
This one has my vote. I mean, I think the results would be terrible, but in a really funny, The Fanatic-kinda way.
A Kiss Meets the Phantom of the Park-Esque Fantasy
I would also be happy with this. It would basically be the same thing as the Five Fingers of Death remake, but likely even sillier.
A Detroit Rock City-Esque Fan-Focused Film
I can’t imagine this is the road down which FFDP would travel. If they do, though, I’d wager the four leads of Detroit Rock City are available and willing to work for cheap.
A Horrible Experimental Film Having Nothing to Do with Music
I don’t think FFDP are creative enough to go this route, but, again, it would pretty funny if they did.
What kind of movie would you like to see Five Finger Death Punch produce? Let us know in the comments section below!
