«
»
Jumping Darkness Parade

JUMPING DARKNESS PARADE: EYAL WANTS TO KNOW — HOW MUCH ARE YOU WILLING TO SACRIFICE FOR YOUR ART?

Friday, September 24th, 2010 at 4:30pm by

I’m on a kick these days. My current kick involves trying to figure out exactly what the fuck people mean when they say certain things. Last “Jumping Darkness Parade,” I mentioned that I have no idea what anybody means by the word “great.” Well, here’s another one I just don’t get: “Sacrifice.” I know what the dictionary says it means. And there are a few different connotations for it. Sacrifice one thing in order to gain another. Or you could simply just be selling something at a loss.

So what does it really mean? I mean, clearly it has something to do with loss, but to what degree and under what conditions? When people say they’ve “sacrificed a lot,” what do they mean? Did they sacrifice their legs in combat for your freedom, or did they sacrifice going to Starbucks for a month so that they could buy a new iPhone? It’s another one of those words that gets thrown around with such frequency and with so much intent behind it, but is so subjective that I think it’s more of an accelerant for someone’s story than a word that carries much meaning… at least in most cases.

So when I think of musicians, bands, artists, and creative people of all types who say they want “it” (more on “it” in another installment), I wonder what exactly they are willing to give up for “it.” Would they be willing to sacrifice a normal social life? Would they be willing to sacrifice any hopes of security for an indefinite amount of time? Would they be willing to sacrifice relationships with significant others in order to keep the machine moving? Would they be willing to sacrifice their health? Would they be willing to sacrifice friendships? Would they be willing to sacrifice money they would rather spend on recreational activities? And if the answer is “yes,” than the obvious next question is, “To what degree are you willing to sacrifice?” What comes first? At what point is it too much sacrifice?

The reason I focus on creative people is because they surround me. I could focus on people in the military, but there’s absolutely no point. By virtue of being in the military, you have agreed to sacrifice whatever you may need to for your country. But in matters a little less “important,” like art… how far will people go?

I find that there comes a point where most people start to shy away from their creative pursuits. They typically start dropping like flies when it’s time to really start sacrificing some of their basic human needs — like shelter, love, and security. What do you hear about being band killers besides “creative differences” and drugs? Girls, kids, and money. And that’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with having your priorities in life.

So the question there is, “How much are you willing to sacrifice for your art?” And an even more interesting question for those of us who put our creative pursuits (or any life pursuit, really) above anything and everything…. “Is there something really wrong with us?”

-EL

Daath’s new, self-titled album comes out October 26 on Century Media. Pre-order it here, and then go visit Daath on MySpace.

Tags: , , ,
  • Livetocrush

    im willing to buy at least two shirts at every show i attend ! and possibly buy a split cd i havent heard

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Daniel-Winnett/504952291 Daniel Winnett

    Sacrifice is something that is relative. It’s like the word “big”. A big donut could be about 8 inches in diameter. A big tyre however would be closer to 30 inches. You sacrifice a little like your no-Starbucks-for-iPhone example or you sacrifice a lot like touring and continuing to play dispite the fact that your mother is dying (for example).

    It’s a word that is easily defined and yet can be bent and stretched to cover different situations.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Daniel-Winnett/504952291 Daniel Winnett

      It’s like a great guitarist really:

      Steve Vai can play just about anything on the planet. He is a great guitar player. But out there somewhere is a dude who can barely play “Enter Sandman”… And you’d think “Oh he’s clearly not a great guitar played”… What if the guy has no arms and he plays with his feet… Suddenly even though he can’t play anything near to what the normal “great guitar players” can play he is still a great guitar player in his own right.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Keith-Brown/537636633 Keith Brown

        You took the words out of my mouth (keyboard, fingers? whatever)

        This was exactly what I was gonna say. Props, dude

  • Johnny

    -Being in a metal band from Long Island, New York, I bust my ass to meet with the absolutely fucking rediculous “Pay to Play” venues that DOMINATE Long Island. When we first started out and we had virtually no fans, we blew FUCK TONS of money on our own tickets. How many times do you figure your best friends want to spend their cash to see your band live in a month? I’ve blown entire paychecks preparing for shows, and I still do.

    -My girlfriend of 5 years nags me all the time about not paying her enough attention.

    -My boss hates me for taking off all the time to play shows.

    -Driving 3 hours to play to 15 people.

    I can go on and on and on, but is it really sacrifice? I love what I’m doing and am following my goals so am I really SACRIFICING or simply INVESTING in myself?

    • Ali

      Just because it’s worth it doesn’t make it not sacrifice. I respect your commitment. What’s your band called btw?

    • Tanner

      Fucking awesome attitude. If you love and cherish what you do, then nothing else really matters at the end of the day. Sacrifice or not, at least your making something of yourself and following your dreams. I mean how many people today can make an honest claim like that?

      • Eyal Levi

        I think that sacrifice and investment are not mutually exclusive. If you are investing your time in your future, you are giving up that time for something else. You are both investing and sacrificing at the same time.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Steven-Stamopoulos/575083326 Steven Stamopoulos

      man that pay-to-play thing sounds shit

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Sam-Arundell/580195009 Sam Arundell

      Dude I’m from the UK, we take six hour drives in two small cars with all our gear packed tetris style in the back just to play to the other bands and their merch guys, to get no petrol money because of pay to play! It’s banned in our city, if a band has no fanbase in a different city how can they sell tickets? The job of a promoter is to PROMOTE a show, if they did their job properly they wouldn’t need pay to play! This comes into the sacrifice bit too I guess, a promoter should take the leap and sacrifice a bit of cash to make sure a band has a good show.

      I totally respect your attitude too, I wish all band members had your work ethic!

      • Johnny

        Thanks man, I see you guys know the fun of being a pay to play band also!

        • http://www.facebook.com/people/Sam-Arundell/580195009 Sam Arundell

          Even with all the bullshit that comes with it, I couldn’t think of anything else I’d rather do! We’re buying a van after Christmas and I’m so stoked to drive to shows and be comfy for once haha

  • http://www.myspace.com/nylithia Dental Damnation

    According to an old drummer, yes there is something wrong with us. It’s the ones that stick with it inspite of the “band killers”, that sacrifice the most in music….especially when the basic human needs, as you said, are not met…When bands succeed all around you and have sacrificed little to get where they are, you start to question your own sacrifices. Thus the wrench in the spokes.

  • http://www.myspace.com/ Giantofthemountain

    im lucky, my wife and i are in the same band so i dont have to sacrifice a relationship for my art. the other band members of course are already having a few problems and we’ve only been together 2 months. i feel like i get to have my cake and eat it too.

  • http://farbeyonddriven87.tumblr.com Voltron Futura

    What is “it”?

    • maaax

      It’s it.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Lance-Zeran/100000142665110 Lance Zeran

        tacos

        • Austin Nutter

          What. Is. It.

          • http://www.facebook.com/people/Ben-Robson/1375985482 Ben Robson

            it’s IT!

  • Frank Injection

    Very true dude. I’ve had the normal “situations” over the years, homelessness, lack of social life, no money, no time, severe sleep deprivation, no sense of normalcy, no girlfriend likes when your away on a regular basis, even the ones who claim they can handle it. I’ve never really thought of these things as sacrifices, but more like the response of a choice in life path. My issue with the word sacrifice is that it sort of implies I’m owed something, and I know better than that. Working an artistic profession with no real security involves inevitable risk, and there will always be a time where you have to chose to move forward or give in and find some sense of security. I don’t think there is anything wrong with putting your passion above all else whatever it may be, as long as your happiness is the only thing that is not at risk. At least to me, happiness is the determining factor of absolutely everything. With out it, what’s the point of anything? However, happiness like sacrifice, is relative to the person experiencing it. So it really comes down to personality, some people will always see the glass half empty, I usually feel pretty fortunate to have a glass at all.

    I’m looking forward to our next set of 4am discussions in Denny’s brotherman, see ya then!

    • Eyal Levi

      I like how you see it man. Those of us in the game should be thankful that we’re even in the game. The game comes at a price though and the price isn’t always pretty. But hey, that’s the cost of admission. The right thing to do isn’t always the easiest and while dwelling on what you’ve lost in order to gain isn’t exactly healthy, it would also be dishonest not to at least acknowledge what you went through to get to what you are. It takes strength, courage, and some serious fucking commitment.

      I’m looking forward to hanging out again!

  • Shinaain

    While I don’t have much to contribute to the discussion in terms of “making sacrifices for your art,” I DO know something about making sacrifices. I have to say that I’m feeling Eyal’s observations like a mother-fucker – particularly in regards to the bastardization of “sacrifice” and the relative nature of the term.

    I don’t appreciate it when people get into pissing contests about who makes bigger sacrifices, because I feel that trivializes the sacred nature of having made a true sacrifice to begin with; however, I DO encourage people to try to have a little perspective. Having said that, I can’t help it: When I hear people who have significant others in bands (or anyone who generally travels a lot for their work or other interests) complaining about how hard it is for them to be away from home all the time and it’s so terrible and they don’t know whether they can take it anymore and my god he/she has been gone a month and please feel sorry for me yadda yadda yadda, my general response usually is, “If that’s your reality and that’s what you know of hardship, then fair enough. Actually, no: Fuck you. Please don’t complain to me again until you know what it is to love someone fighting in a war zone or dying of a terminal illness. I don’t care about your bullshit and you plainly don’t understand anything about true *Commitment.* At least be honest and admit that it has nothing to do with whether or not you love that person and everything to do with, ‘What has this person done for me lately?’”

    And with that, the fairness and impartiality I strive to achieve in most things gets shot straight to Hell, but screw it. Wait, what were we talking about again?

    Sacrifice. Obviously, it means different things to different people. Nevertheless, I deny that sacrifice is the same as an “investment,” but I suppose that depends on what you give up and what it’s worth to you – a personal cost-benefit analysis, if you will. I was raised that you work for what you want and work for what you get, but that some ends require nothing less than true Sacrifice. The money and time I put into college was an investment in my future (or so I thought). My personal life and participation in the lives of my family members and loved ones I sacrificed in military service for some nebulous idea of “civic duty.” I was fortunate enough not have seen combat, but I joined with full knowledge I might and that I might not walk away from it – and was fine with that. Several of my very dear and loved ones have given the “ultimate” sacrifice – and not necessarily for God OR country. While my upbringing conditioned me to be skeptical of the idea that anyone can actually make any kind of meaningful “sacrifice” for art, per se, life and experience have made me a believer.

    No pissing contests, BUT I do agree with Eyal that the term is generally over-used and misappropriated.

    • paganheart

      Well said, as always, and thank you for your service.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Kyle-Heider/602520830 Kyle Heider

    From the standpoint of an indie filmmaker (shameless plug: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iRC2_XZxvVs&hd=1), the question of sacrifice is equally as important as it is within the music community. The die-hards among our ranks will give absolutely anything to take a step towards the “dream” as it were. The only difference is that when you’re in a band, no matter what the “dream” is, I feel as if it might be easier or more tempting to step out when the going gets rough and your group isn’t tearing up the charts as quickly as you’d think they would. With cinema, you more or less have to commit 110%. Going in, you can’t try to formulate a Plan B. or an exit strategy in the event you don’t get as famous as you’d like. By doing so, you’re accepting and rationalizing failure as an option. The people that do so drop like flies, and the masochists that stick around live to sacrifice. Sleep, food, money, relationships, comfort, everything you mentioned, we know we’re going to have to deal without, but like musicians, when it all comes together in the end – when we see our finished product on the screen, when we have those eyes fixed on the screen and know that for the following variable length of time we have their minds (parallel to playing an incredible set or finding out people listen to your record ad nauseum) – we know that THIS is what we’re here for, and regardless of the sacrifices, there’s nothing we’d rather be doing.

  • paganheart

    I don’t dread getting out of bed in the morning to go to work, but every so often I want to give my boss the “take this job and shove it” speech and pursue my own creative endeavors (writing) full-time. But I doubt it’ll ever happen. I like—hell, I need—the stability of a steady job and a regular paycheck. I have a mortgage and all the other expenses that go with a house. I have a car that’s paid for but breaks down disturbingly often. I have medical conditions that require me to see doctors and take meds regularly so I don’t end up disabled or dead, and in this country that means health insurance is not optional. And right now I’m the sole breadwinner for my husband and myself while he goes to school full time. I admire, even envy a little, those who sacrifice (yes it’s an overused word) what the rest of us consider a “normal” life in order to pursue music or other creative endeavors. I’m not brave or crazy enough to do it. (I do think there is a little bit of crazy here, at least sometimes; like someone once said, there is a fine line between genius and madness. And more than a few artists have crossed it.) As much as I admire those with that kind of talent and drive, I’m not sure I have it. That makes me very grateful and respectful of all those who are brave enough and believe in their talent and creativity enough to create the music, art, writing, films, etc. that enrich life for the rest of us, often at high cost to themselves monetarily, personally, physically, mentally, etc.

    I also think there is a correlation in the creative world between how much you sacrifice and that elusive thing called “talent.” This is probably a whole other topic, but I know a few people who make their living creatively through music, arts and crafts—I’m including things like making furniture and jewelry here—and while none of them are getting rich, they all share a real passion for what they do and a belief that life would not be worth living if they didn’t at least try to pursue what they see as a calling. All of them have done without financially and materially, and some have lost jobs and relationships as well. (A lawyer I used to work for gave up a six-figure income and a spot on the partnership track at his firm to play drums in a country band. His now-ex wife was not amused.) All of them, at least to my minimally trained ears and eyes, also seem to be very good at what they do. It seems as though the more passionate the artist and the more they are willing to sacrifice for their art, the more “talent” is there. But is there really such a thing as “talent” or a “gift,” or is it really just a combination of very hard work, lots of passion and a little luck? (Like I said, probably a whole other topic…)

    • Shinaain

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EPrSVkTRb24

      Anyone not feeling this is already dead. Metal. \m/

    • Eyal Levi

      How many times have you heard a great person say that they had NO other choice but to pursue their talent? It is what it is with some. There is a such thing as “talent” and a “gift.” But that alone isn’t enough. The hard work, passion, and little luck are all factors. But those are what you do ON TOP of the talent to make things work.

  • Blogspots!!!

    Your articles are the best thing about this site… this is definitely one that should be read by ANY band that’s unsigned and just getting started, and are of a mind that they want “it” and think they’re all about it, but aren’t willing to give it 110% to get “it”.

    There’s a HUGE difference between the ‘casual’ band that wants to play shows and maybe kinda build a name mostly for the sake of partying and getting laid than to actually make something of it… Versus the band that pushes everyone else in life to the side in order to play shows, promote and market themselves consistently and effectively and put nothing before that goal.

    “What exactly are you willing to give up… In order to keep the machine moving” is the best statement ever! It really is a machine, and once you start it up you better be serious about doing whatever it takes to keep it moving, because once you stop, it stops… and you’re pretty much done. Music is more disposable today than ever before and people move on, instantly making you ‘out of sight out of mind’. And it’s hard as fuck to get that machine going again when you prove to potential fans that you just don’t have what it takes to make it happen.

    Everybody probably gets one legitimate shot at it, and it all comes down to how they approach it and what they’re willing to ‘sacrifice’ for it. Most will give up and let it go once they realize exactly what it takes to make it, and that their dreams of ‘overnight success’ aren’t really in the cards…

    Just my two cents…

    • Eyal Levi

      Thanks man. And you’re right, there’s no room at all, not even an inch for slacking these days.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Andrew-Sterner/1335958279 Andrew Sterner

    Well, I happen to have a friend who is an aspiring blacksmith. I’d say he’s sacrificed, and is sacrificing still, a lot to try to do what he enjoys.

    I’ll start by saying the only reason he isn’t “homeless” is because he’s found a condemned house to take residence in. Before he gave up on having a place to really call home he moved from place to place for about two years.

    He works two jobs(full time), and when he can takes classes at university in metallurgy and the like. he has no car, only a mountain bike he found in a dumpster. He cooks using his blacksmithing fire.

    But, despite the sacrifices he’s making, he’ll be fine. At this point he really can’t lose anything, there’s nothing there to lose.

    I should also mention his money from those two jobs doesn’t go to drugs or anything. he’s trying to save money for a vehicle, then a house, and on top of all that equipment.

    Now, that’s him. I’m not an artist, so i find what he’s doing to be really silly. But, it’s not that, our priorities are just different.

    • Eyal Levi

      I admire your friend. That’s about as true as it gets.

  • Adam

    Eyal, great post. Another winner that has created some great replies.

    looking forward to your next post as usual!

    • Adam

      Alright, now that I’ve actually read most of the replies, I feel the need to elaborate.

      I’m currently 26, and my goals/dreams in life have changed quite a bit in the last 7 years (I graduated from high school 7 years ago). I’ve been to college twice full time and now a 3rd time in night school.

      Most of my goals/dreams have been to get a cool job in the music industrry, whether as a band website designer, recording engineer, radio host, live sound guy, doing film scores, being a video game music composer… these have all been dreams of mine. Only very briefly did I ever want to be in a band and try to get famous. I figured out 2 things pretty quickly (and am glad I did). 1) I didn’t want to play a popular style of music, which would mean little to no radio play, a smaller (but more loyal) fanbase and generally a harder go of it and 2) the music industry is a cruel, cruel mistress, and basically if you aren’t willing to sacrifice just about anything, you’ll likely never make it.

      I decided I didn’t want to work in the music industry bad enough due to the demands of most of the jobs (working 40-80 hour weeks, basically either always being working or sleeping with little downtime/alone or quiet time, hard to have a relationship unless you are dating someone from work or who you see while working) and started working on figuring out what I WAS gonna do with my life. I decided to go for a safer/more stable profession in accounting, which I found out could still kind of work for me in that I could do accounting for bands, artists/performers, record labels, concert venues… so I could still be involved in an indirect way, and I actually do really enjoy accounting and don’t have to worry about working such crazy hours, and I can have a stable life, have a relationship, have some money, and still be connected to music.

      I went back to school for accounting and just recently found a job in the field too. Outside of school and work, I am a part time hobby musician, I write and record music which I will be releasing for free online when it’s done and I am still managing to have something of a healthy social life, have time to chill out and enjoy my other hobbies, and even date someone.

      I definitely tip my hat to those who make the immense sacrifices that true artists have to make to succeed, I realized it wasn’t in me and figured out something I was able/willing to work for. And when I go to a show and see a band and they really put their heart into it, even if it’s a small crowd, well I appreciate and respect them for that, because they’re fulfilling their responsibility to the crowd and their fans. If you don’t give 100% every day at whatever your job is, then that shouldn’t be your job.

  • rick

    This is a great topic. I just had this issue come up for me last night. I had to recently quit a band that had some talented members and had good connections. They loved my guitar playing and really wanted me to be a member, but I came to the realization that in order for me to be in the band it was going to cost me alot of money and all of my free time. The commute was far (over 2 hours one way) and they wanted money up front every month for full access to a rehearsal space. Since I’m trying to save up to buy a house I decided that it wasn’t gonna work and I knew I was going to burn myself out. I had already gone through the same situation in a previous band that was actually doing pretty good, but I became resentful of the band taking all of my free time and my money that I left, and the band fell apart later. I reasoned that I can find people to jam with locally and still have a good time and not kill myself. But I ask myself, what if this other band gets singed and makes it huge? That’s the gamble and risk that some are willing to make in order to live the dream, and I guess I’m not one of those people.

    • http://myspace.com/theswampzombiecult Blake

      I respect you for knowing your limits and doing what’s best for you.

      • paganheart

        Ditto.

  • Corpse Pus

    Scott Hull seems to have found the sweet spot. Stable job, wife, kids. And he does Pig Destroyer AND Agoraphobic Nosebleed AND the occasional comp record championing other bands. I guess it does depend on what you mean by ‘getting there’ and ‘making it’.

    Or, as Charles Bukowski says: ‘Great art is horseshit, buy tacos.’

  • Noel

    great one again eyal. it relates to my current state of mind, ironically. im 18 and just entered collage..ive been busy w school work, but mainly been focused on exsistential problems relating life. ive been playing drums since i was 12, and became obsessed with it. i would drum sometimes 3 hours a day and think of nothing else otherwise. ive been in the studio 3 times with three different bands since then, and have been playing shows since i was 16. but recenly, over the last 2-3 months, ive realized that where i live [milwaukee] there isnt a scene for what i want to do. moving to a bigger city and trying to make it is a fantasy due lack of money, and school for me personally seems to be a route to failure and regret. i could never be a paper pusher or accountent or some bullshit job. i grew up drawing and became very good at that, and gave that up when i couldnt afford to go to art school, which is when i took up music. i think “privalige” is another word that goes with sacrifice. those who have the means to succeed tend to do so easier than those who start at the bottom. it seems that art is so expendable these days because of everything being everywhere, the value of art or music has diminished..

  • blowtorch massacre

    ^ You are an asshole.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Sam-Arundell/580195009 Sam Arundell

    1

  • rick

    I’m wondering why you think i’m an asshole, but I realize that this comment is from 2 days before mine and the site is just fucked up.

  • Corpse Pus

    Don’t worry, now the site makes it look like I’m an asshole.