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Everyone's Replaceable, Hipsters Out Of Metal!

IT’S OFFICIAL: DREAM THEATER DRUMMER SEARCH IS ANNOYING

 Thursday, April 21st, 2011 at 3:20pm by

You may be nowhere near the edge of your seat in anticipation of Dream Theater’s unveiling of their new drummer, but today we all grind one notch closer to the big moment with an official video that documents their search and their cheeseball humor and their extreme case of post-Portnoy butthurt. To view the clip — which lists potential DT sticksmen Thomas Lang, Aquiles Priester, Virgil Donati, Mike Mangini, Marco Minneman, Derek Roddy, and Peter Wildoer – you have to like them on Facebook and get spammed into a different dimension. Or just watch The Gauntlet’s version above before it gets pulled.

–ADF

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  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Travis-Downey/541071247 Travis Downey

    They should make a Vh1 reality show about this. They already have the trailer for it.

    • JimC

      Exactly what I thought.

      What a fucking travesty.

    • Bierko

      They decided to use the formula for “Making The Band”, standing themselves in instead of a boy band. Good job!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Matthew-Kurtz/1493586117 Matthew Kurtz

    *facepalm* This band is like the Gwyneth Paltrow of metal. And by that, I mean they’re insufferable, pretentious asswipes

  • gregg

    what a bunch of dicks.

  • Dirtman73

    I now officially hate this band more than any other that I can think of ATM. What a stupid, self-serving publicity stunt.

  • Robbie Lucero

    can’t wait to see who it is! I bet Mike Mangini has it? Yes… No?

  • Wayn
    • Benito

      yes.

  • http://www.myspace.com/thestarsthrewdowntheirspears Tim

    What a bunch of cheese-ball douche bags.

  • Anders

    Looks like a trailer of American Idol…

  • cougar party

    Is there a more lame, classless, way to announce a new member in the band?

    I feel like all the hype/promotion they are putting into this announcement is mainly to piss off Mike Portnoy.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Matt-Hurley/1289730334 Matt Hurley

      Inb4 Portnoy makes a press release about how “lame and classless” DT are being about their new drummer search.

      • http://www.gravatar.com/avatar/3f5277b5a2a1151d47acb5d068e70f9b.png Robbie Lucero

        where is the press release? I want to read it?

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Devon-Czekaj/550092101 Devon Czekaj

    I’ve been having fun following the drama, but that video had to be the most melodramatic piece of fluff I’ve watched in awhile.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Alexander-Jacobs/100000030228475 Alexander Jacobs

    I love Dream Theater but that video was fucking stupid as hell. the next album better be fucking amazing.

    • ACoffinShip

      I’m still holding out hope that they’ll replace Portnoy with Gene Hoglan. And James LaBrie with Devin Townsend.

      …In fact, I’m just plain hoping Strapping Young Lad will do a tour after the Devin Townsend Project wraps up. Dream Theater hasn’t really been worth giving a shit about since Octavarium

  • Aether Jake

    This looks like a summer “coming of age” movie trailer.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Matt-Hurley/1289730334 Matt Hurley

    I for one really enjoyed the band finally actually giving us some info. Derek Roddy…theres a guy I wouldn’t have suspected. Everyone else had pretty much been rumored the hell out of though, and Mike Mangini being the first one to pop up = Instant giveaway.

  • http://www.heavyblogisheavy.com Jeff B

    One of the worst things I’ve ever seen. NO ONE CARES

  • ZapBranigan

    They need to redo the voiceover to “3 of the most talented musicians in the world….and James Labrie.”

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Nicodemus-Gonzalez/100000496989391 Nicodemus Gonzalez

      LOL

    • Wayn

      I lol’d – good one!

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Luis-Rodriguez/601735615 Luis Rodriguez

      Genius!

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Michael-Fazio/100000259110835 Michael Fazio

      you sir are indeed a scholar. that was epic.. great lolz

  • allenb

    off the rails

  • Kill All

    Peter Wildoer is sporting a Darkane shirt, +1 for shameless self-promotion

  • clrtxf

    Fuck you DT. You make it really hard to like you.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Glenn-Pillsbury/641369365 Glenn Pillsbury

    I’m a long-time DT fan, and I loved the over-the-top cheesiness of this. Yes, the stated reasons for not announcing the new drummer have been completely asinine, but something so Hollywood as a drummer audition reality show thing totally makes up for that. Pass the popcorn!

    • Skylar

      +1. I’m actually entertained by this, and if they’re really going hold out like this, it’s the least they can do.

  • thatdude

    FUCK DT!

    NOT ONE OF THESE FUCKHEADS BEAT OUT MIKE PORTNOY!

    • http://deleted Wade Wiseman

      Actually pretty much every single one of these drummers is more creative than Portnoy.
      His drumming and writing has been sub-par for years.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Matt-Hurley/1289730334 Matt Hurley

        1

      • bretton

        1

      • bretton

        not to mention just better at drums

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Chris-Pinson/1402489026 Chris Pinson

    You assholes, Charlie Zeleny is WILLING TO DO IT, GET HIM

    Virgil Donati would be nice

    • clrtxf

      I know, fucking seriously. Zeleny kills most of these dudes. Anyone who doesn’t believe me needs to go listen to Blotted Science.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jacob-Quintero/788612754 Jacob Quintero

      Agreed. When I first heard they were looking for a new drummer, I was hoping for either Zeleny or Bobby Jarzombek.

  • Ann Marie

    Overdone, overextended, overplayed, overworked – I’m so over this. Just announce it already and then we’ll decide if we’re still interested. Continued delays push them into the realm of irrelevance. Shame for a band who has had so much impact.

  • Mouthful of Precious Stones

    Fuck Marco Minneman. After that shit he pulled with Necrophagist he deserves to be in a band as shitty as dream theater

  • Strapping Young Lad

    Psh. Who cares. These drummers are just a bunch of hunks anyway.

  • facemelter

    ill put my nuts on their collective drumsets

    • http://ametaleducation.blogspot.com/ Throne777

      Wouldn’t suggest you do it whilst their hitting them with sticks.
      Unless you’re into that sort of thing.

  • Aaron

    I really don’t see what was so pretentious about this at all. all the comments made it seem like i would hate dream theater after this and, uh, i don’t really see what everyone is so pissed about. Seems like everybody is more butthurt about dream theater picking a drummer than dt are about Mike Portnoy.

    And if you don’t give a fuck, why are you watching this?

  • Ian

    Honestly i know theirs alot of hating on DT hear because their egotistical, and as a dream theater cocksucker, i have to kinda agree, and they do deserve some of it honestly. But mike was the most down to earth of the group. I really wonder where the attitudes will go without him

  • Bierko

    Cool. They turned themselves into a boy band. Lou Perlman is trying to send them a contract from prison.

    …and 10 million albums? If you’ve ever seen Portnoy interviews over the years, he cries poverty and says they never sold that many albums. This band has been minting money because of dumb fans for years.

    And also, cue the “most talented musicians” phrase in the video. Talented? Certainly. But they can’t write a song for shit anymore.

  • Dan the man

    I’ve been a DT fan for years and I think commercializing this whole thing is really not cool and it’s stupid… it’s like airing out your dirty laundry and reflects negatively on the band.
    To my opinion they’re doing this to piss off Portnoy… another band in a pissing match… well you know what?… this will cause DT to loose alot of dedicated fans… only 2 original members left… just like that Van Halen soap opera years ago*&@#$

    • Ann Marie

      Gotta agree with Dan the man. These are my thoughts exactly. I went from being a huge DT fan, to being somewhat puzzled by their directions, to somewhat apathetic about some of the latest music to being totally irritated with the dragged out drummer situation. They better get their sh*t together quickly or I’m tuning out.

  • http:///www,twistedcritic.wordpress.com Chris

    Shit, that was cheesier than their past 3 albums put together. And I love all the comments chastising the band for making this video, as if this wasn’t 100% Roadrunner’s doing.

    I also love how there’s virtually no mention of the fact that they’re working on a new album (which is really the only thing we’re morbidly curious about) – just the fact that they have a new drummer.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Joseph-David-Maniscalco/812510281 Joseph David Maniscalco

    Oh jeez, come on guys. Way to make it look like Mike Portnoy didn’t want to come back. He needed a break, you guys said no. You took that opportunity to find another drummer because you couldn’t give common courtesy to a “brother” as you call him to refresh a little. You’ve been doing it for years. If he really was your brother you might have understood him wanting a rest. He didn’t want to leave. I can’t believe you think that anyone believes this poor me crap. You put yourself in this position. You don’t get the sympathy card. Sorry. I am curious to see who the new drummer is and a little excited, but no sympathy for you. You did this to yourself. Cry me a river guys. Our brother left boohoo. Well you slammed the door in his face. Way to have about as much class as perez hilton. Let’s keep the drummer search drama free guys k? No antagonizing. Move forward. You made this bed, sleep in it. No Portnoy digs, just keep the focus on you, as it seems like that’s what you really wanted anyway.

    • Dan the man

      Come on man, you need a break, you dont jump into another band, you spend time with your family… unless you’re on crack and drink apple jacks for breakfast… first of all who knows what really happened?… the rest of the band dont have to tell us everything that went on… dont get me wrong Mike is a fuck’n great drummer, but nobody likes a show off… and he was one… he’s not irreplacable… stop trying to outdo other bands/ other drummers… and make your own music… that was probably one of mike’s setbacks.
      Here’s some advice for the new drummer… dont be a fuck’n show off cuz it’s a major turn off.

  • larsS

    take all seven with you on tour and died like your music, booooooring!!!!!!!!!!