When I was fifteen years old, I had to sneak out of my parents’ house on a Friday night to go see GWAR and the Misfits play a Halloween show. Then I had to conceal my clothing from my parents, seeing as it was, y’know, soaked in blood, urine, and semen.

Here we are all these years later, pretty much right at the anniversary of that show, and GWAR are on a popular, mainstream late-night talk show. And yet, somehow, they seem no less rebellious than they ever were.

Which is all my way of saying, “GWAR rules.” And they do. They rule. Hard.

ANYWAY, here are some things we did this week:

• Speaking of GWAR, Dave “Oderus Urungus” Brockie himself provided us with more insights into the NFL. Meanwhile, several members of the Relapse Records family gave us the skinny on the new NHL season, and The Austerity Program’s Justin Foley pondered the pros and cons of new technology in music.
• We debuted Jucifer’s new video, for the song “Hiroshima.”
• We got exclusive specs on Contain Us, the new box set from The Devin Townsend Project.
• We spoke to Steel Panther and Niilo Sevänen from Insomnium.
• We checked out the latest release from Carnifex.
• We continued the Countdown to the Metal Suckfest and defended Danzig.
• We counted down the eleven cardinal rules of attending a concert.
• We wondered if nu-dethcore is the next big thing.
• We cried because even ex-members of Metallica make bad music now.
• We argued about the best debut albums of the past twenty-five years.

And that’s it! Have a delightful weekend, gang. We’ll see ya Monday.

-AR

We had a lot of fun last year doing an NHL preview with our friends at Relapse Records – so much fun, in fact, that we wanted to do it again this year!

Unfortunately, we got a little distracted with some other business, and so this year’s edition is a) somewhat less comprehensive than last year’s, and b) not really a preview at all, seeing as the NHL season actually began two weeks ago. Still… we got some fun people weighing in, including members of Misery Index, Fuck the Facts, 16, and Hero Destroyed. Read ‘em all after the jump!

Click to read more…

Aborted are one of those bands I honestly have never listened to enough to have an opinion about their music, but the fact that their upcoming release, Global Flatline, features guest appearances from the likes of The Black Dahlia Murder’s Trevor Strnad, Misery Index’s Jason Netherton, and Rotten Sound’s Keiijo Niinima means that my interest is now piqued. And the new, totally disgusting and NSFW trailer for the album ain’t hurtin’ any.

No joke — if you ever wished that the killer in the Saw movies was a pretty lady instead of an old dude, you are going to love this.

Aborted’s Global Flatline comes out January 24 via Century Media; the title track will be released as a single next week.

-AR

Adam Jarvis of Misery Index!

Waitaminutehere… I didn’t even know PxDx had parted ways with now-former drummer Brian Harvey. But, there you have it… Adam Jarvis is the new Pig Destroyer drummer, as posted on Scott Hull’s Facebook and picked up by Metal Injection. Whether this means Jarvis has left Misery Index isn’t clear, but it doesn’t seem likely: Pig Destroyer shows are few and far between, making their drum throne exactly the kind of gig that another active drummer could handle.

I’m not nearly the Pig Destroyer fan Axl is, but I know that Axl and the legions of PxDx die-hards will be quite excited with this news, as it probably means recording for a new record will soon begin. Expect a new Pig Destroyer album in early 2012 via Relapse Records.

-VN

Eyehategod are playing Europa in Brooklyn tonight with Misery Index, Magrudergrind, Strong Intention, and Mutilation Rights; that’s a sweet, sweet line-up, and the last time Eyehategod played Europa, they basically tore the place right the fuck apart. (There’s also something kinda funny about Eyehategod playing a venue that is, quite literally, right next door to a police station.)

Alas, I won’t be there, and I don’t think Vince will, either. But at least we can console ourselves with this footage of the band playing a new song in Philly on Wednesday night. And it sounds quite Eyehategod-like. The band is supposed to have a new album, called Whiskey Drink, out later this year, and this bodes well for it being appropriately scummy. Check it out…

-AR

[via Metal Injection]

Why, it was just a couple of days ago that we learned that bassist Terry Butler and drummer Greg Gall have both quit Six Feet Under, and already, the band has announced a replacement for Gall: Kevin Talley, who is joining the group as part of his apparent bid to play with every band ever at least once. (Already on his resumé: Daath, Chimaira, Misery Index, Dying Fetus, Hate Eternal, Suffocation, The Black Dahlia Murder, The Red Chord, and probably fifteen other bands I’m forgetting about.)

Click to read more…

[UPDATE: Now with actual pics included! Sorry. -Ed.]

Earlier this week we shared with you some photos taken by Alyssa Lorenzon at the First Unitarian Church in Philadelphia on December 17th, 2010, and those pics were some of the bad-assiest, hairiest, most metal pics of Skeletonwitch we’ve ever seen. Fellow MS photographer Mariel Pietrykoski was on-hand at the same show and snapped some excellent pics of the other bands on the bill, A Life Once Lost, Job For A Cowboy and Misery Index. Those pics after the jump!

Click to read more…

In brief: Relapse is offering a free sampler for download to anyone who goes to their Facebook page and hits that little ol’ “like” button. As you can see from the track list below, there’s a ton of good shit on it, including new songs from Abysmal Dawn, Red Fang, and Noisear, plus some remastered Death, plus great stuff from Baroness, Revocation, Cephalic Carnage, Dying Fetus, Misery Index, Agoraphobic Nosebleed, Brutal Truth, Murder Construct… the list goes on and on. This could very easily be the soundtrack for your New Year’s Eve partying.

Go here to download the sampler. Happy fucking new year.

-AR

Banner Designed by Cysquatch

Welcome to “Question of the Week,” a (sometimes) weekly debate amongst the MetalSucks staff regarding a recent hot button issue.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, which means we’re taking off early today and won’t be back ’til Monday. We’re sorry to leave non-American readers high n’ dry, but PLUS ONE FOR FREEDOM, MOTHERFUCKERS.

ANYWAY, in honor of the holiday, we decided to do a special Turkey Day-themed QOTW designed to make you feel all warm and cuddly inside:

WHAT (IN METAL) ARE YOU THANKFUL FOR?

The MS staff’s answers after the jump.

Click to read more…

Earlier this week I had a dream that I was working with Atreyu. I don’t know in what capacity I could possibly find myself “working with” Atreyu, since I’m not a manager, nor a publicist, nor a label rep, and they’re about as likely to end up doing a guest column here as I am to give the new In This Moment album a perfect 5-horn review, but, hey, the subconscious works in mysterious ways. Why did I have Atreyu on the brain? Was my mind trying to tell me “The glass is half-full?” Do I have  a hankering to re-watch The Neverending Story? Did I just ingest too many different substances that night? I’ll have to bring it up in therapy next week.

Here’s other shit that happened this week, some of which, believe it or not, is even more terrifying than the thought of working with Atreyu:

• Freddy Madball is counting down his favorite hard and heavy non-hardcore bands of all time, TesseracT’s Acle walked us through the history of djent, The Austerity Program’s Justin Foley spoke to Converge’s Kurt Ballou about Taco Riffs, The Red Chord’s Greg Weeks made some suggestions for losing NFL teams, Intronaut’s Sacha Dunable contemplated the ways in which technology has changed touring, Daath’s Eyal Levi wondered, “Is this it?”, and a wide array of metal stars previewed the just-begun NHL season.
• We spoke to Kirk Windstein from Crowbar/Down/Kingdom of Sorrow, Sean Z. from Daath, Daddy X and Dirtball from Kottonmouth Kings, and Yoshiki Hayashi from X Japan.
• We checked out the latest releases from Abysse and Deafheaven.
• We contemplated trancecore.
• As the headline says, we heard the worst thing ever.
• We reviewed the history of terrible Limp Bizkit cover songs.
• We had fun with misheard song lyrics.
• We bemoaned the signing of another re-thrash band.
• We applauded Slayer fans’ desire to help the physically disabled.
• We had yet another laugh at Winds of Plague’s expense.

We have a special surprise for you next week. I can’t promise you’re going to like it, but I can promise you’re going to have a strong reaction to it. See ya then.

-AR

So right now you’re probably thinking 1) “Hey, assholes, the NHL season actually started last night so this can’t really be a ‘preview’ in the traditional sense of the word,” and 2) “Hey, assholes, at least one of these artists isn’t actually signed to Relapse Records.” And, yes, we know we’re a little late, but this is metal, so who the fuck is ever on time? And, yes, we know that at least one of these artists isn’t actually signed to Relapse Records, but most of them are, and the fine people at Relapse really did all the work in putting this together, so ppppfffffttttt.

So. After the jump, you can find previews of how the freshly-begun NHL season is looking for the favorite teams of members of 3 Inches of Blood, -(16)-, Buried Inside, Cephalic Carnage, Cretin, Dekapitator, Exhumed, Fuck the Facts, Gravehill, Hero Destroyed, Indian, Misery Index, Mortuous, Repulsion, and Toxic Holocaust. Enjoy!!!

Click to read more…

Remember when we posted Metal Injection’s totally awesome footage of Misery Index playing at the Brooklyn stop of Despised Icon’s farewell tour? It was two days ago, so you should.

Well, guess what? Metal Injection has now posted footage of Despised Icon playing at the Brooklyn stop of Despised Icon’s farewell tour! Below, you can check out “A Fractured Hand.” I like this song because the lyric I used for the headline often reminds me of my relationship with my family. Thanks for coming to drag me to rehab back when I was sucking cock for crack rock, mom and dad!

Unfortunately, this footage features no shots of Vince and myself wiggering out, or of the ugliest girl we’ve ever seen, and it only kinda-sorta gives you a sense of how big the pit was (no joke, the biggest pit I’ve ever seen at this particular venue and possibly in this particular borough), but I still enjoy it anyway.

Metal Injection have three more awesome clips of the last time Despised Icon will ever play NYC until they reunite in a few years; check those out here.

-AR

Earlier this month, we commemorated 9/11 the way any true patriot should — by going to the Brooklyn stop of Despised Icon’s farewell tour. Highlights of the evening included watching a bouncer threaten to beat the shit out of a 16 year old kid in a DI jersey who tried to sneak into the show, Vince and I getting drunk and doing the Panteradactyl all night, spotting the single ugliest girl we’ve ever seen in our lives (no joke, she looked kinda like this with tits), and, oh yeah, excellent sets from Despised Icon, Misery Index, and Revocation.

While we’re sad that you couldn’t all be there to share in the ridiculousness with us, we’re glad that our pals at Metal Injection were on-hand to capture some of the action. Here, for example, is an excellent video of Misery Index performing “We Never Come in Peace” and “Theocracy.”

You can also watch some killer footage of Misery Index performing “Heirs to Thievery” here. And I know that the MI dudes were filming during Despised Icon’s set, so hopefully we’ll get some footage of that soon, too.

-AR

Despised Icon are breaking up, and that’s a bummer, but at least they’re giving their fans one last chance to check ‘em out live before they call it quits. And if you’ve never seen Despised Icon in concert before, well, you really ought to — these dudes know how to bring it. And my recommendation should seem doubly impressive to you given that Despised Icon are basically French-Canadian wiggers, which, in theory, should really piss me off.

They’re bringing along Misery Index and Revocation, too — and both those bands absolutely slay live. These shows are gonna be fun, man.

Here are dates, courtesy of Lambgoat:

Click to read more…

Just so you know, when Vince and I cuddle, he’s usually the big spoon.

Here’s what happened in MetalSucks Land this week:

• Misery Index’s Jason Netherton joined us for the latest edition of Cooking Contaminated.
• Intronaut’s Sacha Dunable wondered if corporate-sponsored metal shows are killing the live concert market.
• We chatted with Soilwork’s Peter Wichers, Mantric’s Ole Halvard Sveen, and Black Army Jacket’s Carlos Ramirez.
• We checked out new releases by Norma Jean and Lightning Swords of Death.
• We celebrated the excellent year currently being enjoyed by Metal Blade Records.
• Korn played to the largest audience they deserve. (That would be an audience of zero.)
• New BOO means debates by you.
• Poison the Well poisoned our week.
• We were on the Metal Injection Livecast!
• Booty shake.

Next week is hair metal week! We’ll still be reporting on regular metal, too, so don’t freak out too hard. See ya Monday.

-AR

Welcome to the third episode of Cooking Contaminated, the brand new heavy metal cooking show brought to you by MetalSucks and your host, Eli Shaika. This episode features a special crab cake recipe concocted by guest shredder/cooker Jason Netherton of Misery Index, with a side of roasted corn and Creole melted butter sauce! Those juicy morsels of delicious sea goodness look soooo good. Jason is welcome over to the MS Mansion to cook for us any time he’d like. I hear there’s some good bird-watching to be done from our roof… hmmm….

After the jump you’ll find a list of ingredients so you can follow along at home. Also be sure to check out Episode 1 with vocalist Mike Hrubovcak of Monstrosity and his brother, bassist JJ Hrubovcak of Hate Eternal, and Episode 2 with Athon and James from Black Tusk.

Click to read more…

I had completely forgotten about Vince’s love of Bob Ross until his post yesterday. It would have been awesome if Bob had done an all-metal edition of his show, in which he discussed the joy of Ed Repka and Paul Romano. Learning about your craft is so metal! Thanks for reminding me, Vince, about what an inspiration Bob should be to us all.

Here’s some other things we did this week:

• We spoke to Anthrax’s Joey Belladonna, the legendary Wino, Harvey Milk’s Creston Spiers, and Cruel Hand’s Chris Linkovich.
• Vince, Axl and Gary discussed their favorite albums of 2010 so far.
• We’re giving away a free mp3 of Fistula’s “Ohio Death Toll Rising.”
• We checked out new releases by Kvereltak, Misery Index, Watain, and Parkway Drive.
• Anso reviewed the Big Four Live from Sofia, Bulgaria movie theater satellite thingy.
• Vince did a really a good job of impersonating Axl.
• Vince also discovered two new Sumeriancore bands that stink, and one that doesn’t.
• He also wondered: What is it with drummers wearing basketball jerseys?
• Guess what Serj Tankian thinks borders are?
• DEVIN TOWNSEND HEADLINE TOUR! DEVIN TOWNSEND HEADLINE TOUR!!!

A week from today, Vince and I see Faith No More in Brooklyn. So expect lots and lot of pointless pondering about FNM next week, ’cause that’s pretty much all I’m gonna be able to think about.

-AR

The title track of Misery Index’s 2008 album Traitors was perhaps the first truly great anti-Bush song. Granted, it certainly wasn’t the first anti-Bush song (hell, Al Jourgensen decided to wrap up Ministry‘s career with a trilogy of albums dedicated to them), but most of the others felt like empty sloganeering even if their heart was in it. But something about “Traitors” hit home particularly hard, perhaps because instead of aiming white-hot rage at Bush’s lies and hypocrisies and his party’s Eisenhower-era morality, there was a weariness with it, a genuine disdain for decades of Neocon rule and the culture of “real America” that surfaced in its wake (bassist/vocalist Jason Netherton barking the final lyrics “and not through them defined by fucking flags on SUVs and Super Bowl half times” before chanting “traitors” for the remainder of the song). Instead of capturing the anger in the heat of the moment, in 2 ½ minutes, the band dig into the Earth to the root of their disgust through an incendiary metallic hardcore song. So, fittingly, Traitors was released a little more than a month before Bush was out of office for good. In theory, it was too little, too late. In fact, now that Bush has been gone for about a year and a half (and, sorry Keith Olbermann, but we don’t need any more anti-Bush songs), the song still has a feeling of relevance, like all good protest songs do from Dylan to Bad Religion.

The rest of that album, while by no means bad, was missing something that Misery Index’s best work — Retaliate and the brilliant EP Dissent – had in spades. The band’s staying power has been attributed to its balance of death metal brutality and hardcore looseness, literally metalcore or deathcore before either of them became dirty words. Traitors was too surgically precise for its own good; a friend of mine described it as “being a little too death metal than I’m used to them being.” And while they’re no stranger to death metal — the band, after all, were an offshoot of Dying Fetus, one of the best death metal bands there are and ever will be and don‘t you fucking forget it — when they veer too far into one direction instead of straddling the middle ground of several, they lose some of their punch. Which is what makes their latest full length — the fucking great Heirs to Thievery – so wonderful. The band are back to groove-inflected deathgrind, sounding loose and spontaneous while simultaneously precise and well-rehearsed. Though an excellent new album is always occasion to declare it “the best thing the band has ever done,” Heirs to Thievery, with the passing of time, could very well be that.

Click to read more…

The prize for last week’s photo caption contest was a copy of At the Gates’ The Flames of the End 3x DVD set, a must have for any AtG fan. The winning caption for the photo at right is:

• Coop: “Winds of Plague keyboard tryouts.”

Ba-zing! This week we’re giving away two copies of Misery Index‘s latest death metal banger Heirs to Thievery (listen here). To win, just post a funny caption to the giggle-inducing photo below which continues on with our recent theme. (Remember, if you’re using FB Connect to login, include an email address with your comment so we can contact the winner). Go!

I really only know Johnny Orlando, Jr., because of the work he’s done with Metal Injection, but plenty of people have told me I’m an idiot for not paying closer attention to him. And based on the below video, in which Johnny Orlando , Jr., Jr. asks members of Fear Factory, Misery Index, Revocation and Carnifex that all-important question: “Where do babies come from?”

Kudos to Burton C. Bell for trying to give the kid an honest answer, although Gene Hoglan’s response is clearly the best. Reader Xavier Luxenburg suggests that the absence of a certain guitar player is “confirmation” of his baby eating, but I think that dude actually likes ‘em a little younger than this kid.

-AR

Thanks to everyone who sent this in.