This Sucks

COCKSUCKERS ROB ROBB FLYNN

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I’ve been mugged and I’ve been conned, but, luckily, I’ve never had a break-in. I imagine it feels like you’ve been violated; I know that might sound funny, but I don’t mean it to. Maybe it’s not as bad as a mugging in that there’s no threat of violence, but it’s way worse in that someone invaded your most personal space.

And so I feel a lot of sympathy for Machine Head’s Robb Flynn, who recently lost a lot of valuable stuff — including a guitar gifted to him by Dimebag — during a break-in. Here’s a full statement on the matter from Flynn, including an offer of a reward for anyone who can help retrieve the stolen goods:

“Today, [Tuesday] September 7th, between the hours of 1:15 p.m. and 3:15 p.m. [PST] while I was picking my son up from school, my house [which is located in the Martinez/Virginia Hills area of California] was broken into and many priceless items were stolen. Items include my wife’s jewelry, laptops, wakeboards, cash, and most importantly four of my guitars, including the guitar that I recorded [MACHINE HEAD’s] first album,’Burn My Eyes’, with. Also stolen was a guitar that is priceless to me that was a gift from [late PANTERA guitarist]Dimebag Darrell [see picture above]. The cocksuckers even stole my son Zander’s mini Flying V I got him for Christmas.

“I am offering a $1,000 reward for the return of the black Ibanez Strat along with many stickers, a ‘Designated Drinker’ sticker. Additionally I am also offering a $2,000 reward for the safe return of the blue Washburn Dimebolt prototype.

“An APB has been put out to every Guitar Center in Northern California and the police were able to get several fingerprints off of the two acoustics that the thieves handled, yet bizarrely left behind. Sightings of two suspicious vehicles have been reported, one a green/teal U.S.-make pickup truck, the other a white full-size work van.

“If anyone sees or hears of anything on Craigslist, eBay, at their guitar shop… anything, anywhere! Please contact us at mike@machinehead1.com immediately.”

So this obviously really, really sucks. I hope somebody is able to help Robb out, ’cause he has consistently proven himself to be a man of the people. Help spread the word and track these thieving shitheads down.

-AR

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