Sully Erna’s Acting Debut Looks Amazing


Someone get the folks from How Did This Get Made? on the phone: vocalist Sully Erna has made his acting debut in a movie called Army of the Damned, which, I think we can safely assume, is going to be awful. Hopefully in a really funny way, but still.

Now now, pipe down, Godsuck fans. I know you’re gonna say “Dude you haven’t seen the movie yet, give it a chance.” And I will happily attempt to watch the movie once it’s been released. But the evidence strongly suggests that it’s not a quality flick:

  • It began production in April and is being released on VOD in December. Eight months from production to post-production to release is an insane pace.
  • It stars Sully Erna, who can barely speak English let alone act.
  • It was written and directed by Tom DeNucci, who you’ve never heard of before because all his other credits are for shit you don’t care about.
  • It stars Sully Erna, whose taste in artistic endeavors is roughly on par with that of my dog.
  • The story, about a reality television crew that encounters zombies, sounds like bad rip-off of [Rec], which is about a televison news crew that encounters zombies.
  • It stars Sully Erna, who, unfortunately, did not have a Layne Staley screen performance to reference prior to the commencement of production.
  • In addition to Erna, the cast includes Joey Fatone from N*SYNC, whose previous acting credits include Homie Spunoni, the heartwarming tale of a young African-American running an Italian pizzeria.
  • It stars Sully Erna, who had to be cut out of the movie Pauly Shore is Dead because he couldn’t convincingly play himself.
  • This is the DVD box art:Army of the Damned

Army of the Damned hits VOD on December 3, DVD on January 14, and DVD bargain bins on January 15.


Show Comments
Metal Sucks Greatest Hits