So it’s True: America DOES Got Talent

You know how you can tell that someone’s not a rockstar? When their nickname is “Rockstar.” No one has ever said “Hey, James ‘Rockstar’ Hetfield, would you sign my ass?” Well, actually, it’s possible someone has said that, but that person was most certainly attempting to be funny. Like, you wouldn’t be surprised to hear that Valerie Bertinelli grandfather is like “Hey, there’s my rockstar! Gimme a kiss!” when she sees Wolfgang Van Halen, but that’s about it. Right?

Right.

So. The fact that this guy is known as  Matt “Rockstar” Sikorski is the first tip-off that he’s probably a d-bag. The second is that he auditioned for America’s Got Talent. That’s pretty much a dead giveaway right there. But the final, irrefutable fact that proves, inarguably, that this guy is a yutz? The “talent” he claims to possess:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-HRdYCLZMqs

Uh, Matty, my boy? If you’re reading this, word of advice:

HOW YOU SEE YOU:

HOW EVERYONE ELSE SEES YOU:

Just maybe something to consider moving forward.