Rounds 1 – 4: Lars Ulrich Vs. Dave Mustaine, Varg Vikernes Vs. Tim Lambesis, Maria Brink Vs. Ivan Moody, Geoff Tate Vs. Dj Ashba
As we announced on Friday, the MetalSucks reader-voted Biggest Putz in Metal bracket kicks off today! Shame your choices for the putziest of metal putzi below!!! The polls for these rounds close at 2:30 pm EST tomorrow, Tuesday, August 11.
LARS ULRICH VS. DAVE MUSTAINE
Lars Ulrich is a horrible drummer who somehow had the good fortune to wind up in the biggest metal band of all time (that would be Metallica, duh). That would be bad enough, but to add insult to injury, he is, by most accounts, a total dick: he can seen in Some Kind of Monster complaining about having to play his instrument (poor baby) and pretentiously pondering the meaning of his multi-million dollar art collection, and the less said about the Napster incident, the better. On the other hand, at least he’s not his former bandmate, Dave Mustaine, who is a right-wing conspiracy theorist crybaby that blames everyone else for his own problems. Which of these two putzes is the most shameful, though? You decide!
TIM LAMBESIS VS. VARG VIKERNES
Tim Lambesis threw his career as the vocalist for the very successful metalcore band As I Lay Dying in the garbage when, apparently ‘roided out of his mind, he tried to hire a hitman to murder his estranged wife. Almost as bad: that comments he made after his arrest left fans with the impression that he was unrepentant and wholly out of touch with the severity of his crime. Varg Vikernes, meanwhile, was sent to prison for killing his bandmate, Euronymous, and is a deplorable bigot who makes music that sounds as if it were recorded in the bathroom at his last table top RPG gathering. Which of these criminal less-than-masterminds is worse? Vote below!
We can’t even begin to fathom why people like the music of Five Finger Death Punch, but they do, despite Moody’s generic vocals, macho posturing, horrible fashion sense, and total lack of respect for his fans. We can begin to fathom why people like the music of In This Moment, though: BEWBS. Brink rarely even lets the other members of her band appear in photos and music videos, lest they crowd her cleavage out of the frame. Who would you rather see pack it in and go live with the Mennonites, though? Make your choice!
Although in some ways Tate more closely resembles Ashba’s now-former employer (huge ego, small talent, no regard for the members of his band, etc.), what the vocalist and guitarist have in common in this: they think they are very cool when they are, in fact, anything but. Okay, so Ashba never did anything as douchie as breaking a fan’s cell phone, but he did make a living totally aping Slash in the most ridiculous way possible. Which of these schmucks offends you more? Vote or die!
THE BRACKET SO FAR (click to enlarge):