Woman Accuses the Wrong Mastodon of Scamming Her Son: “You Damn Mother Fuchers”


A woman on the internet created quite a bit of confusion within the Mastodon camp last month when she sent the progressive metal band a string of profanity-laced Facebook messages. At issue was the group’s alleged mistreatment of her son, who she claimed the band “scammed” and sent “on a wild goose chase” after offering him a job.

Mastodon responded by informing the woman that they were on tour in Europe at the time of the alleged incident and didn’t have any jobs to offer anyone anyway. Guitarist Bill Kelliher, who handled the band’s response, couldn’t help but take some shots at the woman for her horrible spelling and Trumpian Use Of Capitalization. You can take a look at screen shots of the exchange below.

While we’re not sure how this story ended, Lambgoat surmises that the woman may have been confusing our metal heroes with the social networking platform Mastodon although several other companies utilize the name of the prehistoric creature as well. Incidentally, the social networking site’s FAQ page reveals that the founders named the service after the band.

Just as much of note here is the revelation that Bill Kelliher handles the band’s Facebook messages! Not some member of their management team, not some marketing assistant at the record label, but an actual band member, down in the trenches, even at Mastodon’s level of fame. And something about Kelliher being the one to do it out of the four of them makes a ton of sense. A true man of the people!

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