Spurred by an lazy crossword clue in The Onion (36 down, four letters: “Faith No More’s only hit”), MetalSucks contributor Anso DF dedicates every single day in August to celebration and exploration of the San Francisco alt-metal greats. Here we prove that history’s greatest band landed more than one commercial hit (crossword answer: “Epic” natch), we revel in FNM’s embarrassing wealth of winning album tracks (themselves often fit for chart topping), and we dip into the staggering best of the b-sides (ditto). Along the way, we survey the context of FNM’s big break (amid similarly seminal acts Jane’s Addiction, Nine Inch Nails, and Ween) to post-Nevermind, panic-based music commerce in which the brilliantly versatile, fearless powerhouse band operated until their 1998 demise. It’s a dirty job, but someone’s gotta do it.

Song “Falling To Pieces”

Written by Patton (L); Gould, Bottum, Martin (M)

Released 1989

Appears on The Real Thing album

Produced by Matt Wallace

Guitars by Jim Martin

Key lyric “Because the plot thickens everyday/And the pieces of my puzzle keep crumblin’ away/But I know there’s a picture beneath”

Single? Yes, The Real Thing’s third and final (preceded by “From Out Of Nowhere” and “Epic”)

The climate Faith No More landed a top-10 single with “Epic,” and followed with another brightly melodic, bouncy, rappy jam. It was around this time that unofficial accusations of imitation began to emit from the Red Hot Chili Peppers camp. Lulz.

Awesome song elevated to supra-awesomeness by Mike Patton, boredom-buster: Over three closing choruses (at 3:31) — industry standard for a single — he tweaks the by-then familiar refrain and then just face-rapes it via awesome ad-libs. That final “whoa-ooh-whoa-oooh-whoa-oh-ohhhhhhh-hohhhh-ooh” sent RHCP singer Anthony Kiedis under a bridge to draw some blood.

Didja know? Stupid jerks Faith No More retired “Falling” from live sets by 1993. Okay fine, it must be annoying for bassist Billy Gould to do that one-finger intro riff a billion times but cmonnn. Play the jam.

-ADF

METALSUCKS’ 31 DAYS OF FAITH NO MORE

4 “Falling To Pieces”

3 “Stripsearch” (read)

2 ”Ricochet” (read)

1 ”Land Of Sunshine” (read)

We all hear how the metal was murdered by grunge, with the newly grave listening public as its willing accomplice. A competing theory is that metal essentially committed suicide, or at any rate fell into disrepair, enabling a transfer of power to guys who moan about their unyielding feelings of injustice and unhappiness. Either way, it’s sad, especially for people who think rock radio should like be fun and shit, instead of being packed with nominally tuneful inventories of jock neuroses.

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It’s a shame Otep’s music sucks so much, because it’s such a waste of a pretty awesome person. Otep Shamaya is smart, articulate, and consistently on point with her messages. She is, in my opinion, the very archetype of what a woman in metal should be. It’s just a shame her music is so mundane and unspectacular, seemingly at complete odds with her personality. Check out her recent appearance on Dave Navarro’s new show Spread TV, plugging her new site allshapesandsizes.org and the MetalSucks-approved Carbon Rally. Listening to her talk it’s hard for me NOT to love this person; she’s the type I could easily imagine running into in my building and being like, “hey Otep, what’s up, wanna come over and smoke a bowl?” and then proceeding to do just that and talk about important issues for hours.

ANYWAY, here’s the clip. Dave Navarro has sunken to levels of tool-ness previously thought unfathomable; some of his between-question banter is jut cringeworthy. Navarro peaked with RHCP’s One Hot Minute, and it’s been all downhill from there. But hey, at least he’s still got a career, so I’ll give him that.

-VN

I will gladly go on record as stating that Blood Sugar Sex Magik is in my opinion the most accomplished album that the Chili Peppers ever made. I felt that back when it was released to my tweening ears in September of 1991, and I still feel it today. Sure, the overwhelming commercialization of the band as a result of the success of “Under The Bridge” made it difficult for any die-hard fan (as well as then/now-guitarist John Frusciante, who abruptly left the band in ’92 to go on a serious heroin bender, then get clean and rejoin the Peppers six years later) to retain feelings of ownership over this once-underground funk rock outfit, but shit dude, music is meant to be free and therefore doesn’t everyone has a right to jump on the bandwagon?

No matter what, the Rick Rubin-produced album represents one of America’s most significant contemporary popular rock bands at their peak, and for a truly entertaining and enlightening peek inside its creation, you really ought to watch Funky Monks, the accompanying documentary about the recording process which the Peppers undertook in a lovely Los Angeles mansion.

If you’ve never heard this album in its entirety, a) go fuck yourself, b) get your hands on a copy, and c) listen to that shit from start to finish. Then d) go fuck yourself again.

Go here to watch Part One of Funky Monks; the whole doc is well worth your very stoned time…

-KW

So a couple of weeks ago Michael Anthony spilled that beans that he and former Van Halen cohort Sammy Hagar “are working on a new project with a couple of good friends.” At the time, I joked that perhaps they were teaming up with Slash, Duff McKagan and Matt Sorum to form Velvet Hagarevolver, a force more powerful than Voltron or, at the very least, Toto.

In point of fact, the reality is much, much worse.

Blabbermouth has now confirmed the rumor we’ve all been hearing from the get-go, which is that the other members of the group are Red Hot Chili Peppers drummer Chad Smith and Joe Satriani. And they’ve settled on the band moniker “Chickenfoot.”

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