Terminal Nation is Doing God’s Work by Catering Some Merch Exclusively to Husky Metalheads

One of the very best things about metal is the fact that you don’t necessarily need to be the hottest person on the planet to make it. It doesn’t matter what your skin color, hair length, gender, sexual orientation, or weight is — if you can play, you’re golden.

And while metal’s the type of music that anyone can play or get into if you’re passionate enough, one area that gets overlooked by bands designing merch is their contingent of husky/big boned/robust/plus-sized/Rubenesque/fat fans. If you’re a fellow husky dude (or lady), you know what I mean. Too often, bands have awesome t-shirt designs that end at 2XL. If that doesn’t fit you, tough shit.

Well, if you’re headed to Decibel’s Metal & Beer Fest: Philly this weekend and you’re a fan of death metal act Terminal Nation, you’re in luck. These crafty motherfuckers know their audience well and as a result, they’ll have a shirt for sale that’s specifically designed for their bigger fans. I’m talkin’ shirt sizes start at 2XL and run all the way to 5XL. As pictured above, their “Super Heavyweight Division” shirt has the catchy phrase “fat dudes fatter riffs” emblazoned on the back, just to let everyone else know what’s up.

Now, I know why most bands don’t cater to the larger sizes. Costs get higher the more fabric each shirt requires, so they try to keep costs down so they can get more t-shirt revenue each night. Makes great business sense, but it’s nice to see one band just say “fuck it” and did the thing.

What’s great is any shirts that don’t get sold in Philly will go online for the general public, so if you’re shopping for a new metal shirt and you could stand to lose a few pounds, this could be a perfect purchase.

The band will also be selling “lavender and sage of turmoil” scented deodorant at the show with the phrase “IT’S OK NOT TO STINK” in big bold letters on the stick. Because we’ve all been to a show and been hit in the face with some horrendous B.O.

Terminal Nation, everyone. They’re the real ones out there. If you’re able to get to Philly this weekend, be sure to get your tickets so you can catch this band live and buy their shit. In fact, buy everyone’s shit so you can support working bands on the road.