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Metal Merch


Metal Merch 0
Fleshgod A-pasta-lypse: Italian Death Metallers Make Spaghetti Now
December 2nd, 2013 at 1:30pm Vince Neilstein

Buy some five-color fusilli for your loved one this Christmas.


Editorials 0
Mastodon’s Genocide-Depicting Thanksgiving T-Shirts Spark an Outrage
December 2nd, 2013 at 10:30am Vince Neilstein

Are calls of “racist” justified?


Metal Merch 0
Now You Can Hit Iron Maiden’s Balls
November 27th, 2013 at 4:00pm Axl Rosenberg

Golf balls, that is.


Metal Merch 0
MetalSucks’ 2013 Holiday Gift Guide for Metalheads
November 25th, 2013 at 3:30pm MetalSucks

If you want metal-friendly and creative gifts, look no further!


Metal Merch 0
There are Fear Factory Cupcakes Now
November 22nd, 2013 at 10:00am Axl Rosenberg

Yummy.


Metal Merch 0
Axl Rose’s Hand-Written Love Letters Not Worth Nearly as Much as J.D. Salinger’s Hand-Written Love Letters
November 19th, 2013 at 3:00pm Axl Rosenberg

His ex-wife will auction items from their relationship next month.


Metal Merch 0
Anthrax Announce Line of Hanukkah Sweaters
November 11th, 2013 at 12:30pm Axl Rosenberg

Caught in a nosh.


Metal Merch 0
“Let Your Reputation of Smell Good Proceed You”: Bret Michaels Makes Cologne Now
November 8th, 2013 at 1:30pm Axl Rosenberg

Every rose has its scent.


Metal Merch 0
I Could Care Less, Indeed: DevilDriver Announce Christmas Sweaters
November 5th, 2013 at 11:00am Axl Rosenberg

Okay, enough already.


Metal Merch 0
Still Need a Halloween Costume? Try These Heavy Metal Cut-Out Halloween Masks!
October 30th, 2013 at 2:00pm MetalSucks

To thanks us, please send us candy.


Metal Merch 0
Trendsetters in Attila Release Christmas Sweater
October 17th, 2013 at 11:00am Axl Rosenberg

“Okay, I’ve been cool about this whole fad up ’til now, but Attila is where I draw the line!!!” declares Jesus.


Metal Merch 0
Not Content to Stop at Socks and Christmas Sweaters, Slayer Announce Line of Ugly Sunglasses and Snowboard Goggles
October 14th, 2013 at 4:30pm Axl Rosenberg

More shit you don’t need.


Metal Merch 0
Screw Christmas Sweaters! Black Label Society are Making an Official Zakk Wylde Halloween Costume
October 8th, 2013 at 4:00pm Axl Rosenberg

How did Slipknot and Ghost not think of this first?


Metal Merch 0
Now You, Too, Can Smell Like Phil Lewis from L.A. Guns
October 7th, 2013 at 3:00pm Axl Rosenberg

Sniff sniff, smells like MAGIRNF (MILF-Aged Groupes I’d Rather Not Fuck).


Metal Merch 0
Now There’s a Motörhead Christmas Sweater, Too
October 1st, 2013 at 2:30pm Axl Rosenberg

It’s arguably the best metal-themed holiday clothing item yet.


Metal Merch 0
Slipknot’s Clown Makes Clown Masks Now
September 25th, 2013 at 11:00am Axl Rosenberg

For the low, low price of jus $500!!!


Metal Merch 0
For a Mere $375, You, Too, Can Have Your Very Own Homemade Vintage Megadeth/Dio/W.A.S.P. Jacket from Urban Outfitters
September 24th, 2013 at 11:00am Axl Rosenberg

Clearly, you NEED such a jacket, lest you be the laughing stock at the Metallica reunion show next week!!!


Metal Merch 0
Metallica Latest Band to Announce Line of Christmas Sweaters
September 19th, 2013 at 10:30am Axl Rosenberg

Guaranteed to keep you warmer than a bear hug from James Hetfield himself.


Cinemetal 0
Black Label Society Release Coffee, Hilarious Commercial for Coffee
September 10th, 2013 at 2:30pm Axl Rosenberg

Someone please get Zakk Wylde a sitcom, PLEASE.


Metal Merch 0
665 Clothing: For Metalheads Who Have Procreated
September 4th, 2013 at 5:00pm Axl Rosenberg

Slightly less evil… but slightly more adorable!


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