Photos by Brian Schroeter

The guys of Anthrax soon go to south and southeast Asia for a week of shows with Hellyeah [Update: These dates have been postponed -- ADF], but their current US run with Testament finished last week. Since the return of glory-era singer Joey Belladonna, the Anthrax world is a fishbowl to which I have pressed my face. So two Saturdays ago, it was time for me to tap on the glass and take notes. The questions: How does Belladonna sing and look? What’s the band body language? Do drummer Charlie Benante’s fills sound off? Has Scott Ian grown a better or worse beard? Can fans exhale a bit here with the firm knowledge that things are groovy for good in the land of Anthrax?

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Hey, so remember when just last week Chuck Billy said there was gonna be a tour this fall with Anthrax, Testament, Overkill, and Death Angel?

Well, yeah, turns out Overkill ain’t doing that tour.

From Metal Insider:

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The usual problems a band must endure from its drummer include tardiness, unfamiliarity with new material, no memory of old material, bringing their gf/driver everywhere, selling gear for food, non-ownership of drumsticks, car trouble, body odor, shortness, loss of one or more shoes, delirium, etc. But some drummer-issues can’t be predicted; for example, completion of the new Testament record has been delayed by drummer Paul Bostaph’s undisclosed injury. Singer Chuck Billy kinda explained Sunday in a radio interview:

Paul Bostaph is injured right now, so he couldn’t [work on] the record. We kind of put the record off a little while waiting for Paul. [Then] we found out he was not gonna be ready, so we brought on Gene Hoglan. Hoglan came in and crushed, killed the drums in about a week.

Awesome! Billy goes on to reveal the new album’s title, its other guest drummer, and the face-fuckingly awesome tour to be announced:

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Gosh, it was April 2009 when I started pestering members of Testament about completion of a follow-up to 2008′s The Formation Of Damnation. True, Formation had come out only twelve months earlier, but it’s my duty as a Testament superfan/powerful journalist/pushy jerk to keep the pressure on; I just will not withstand another interminable gap between killer Testament records, as with Formation and 1999′s masterful The Gathering. I can’t put myself through that again.

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In a wise move, VH1′s fossil-rock chat program That Metal Show has expanded to sixty minutes for its sixth season. As a result, there’s a huge improvement to the ratio of guest interview content to idiot host blathering. Too much of the half-hour TMS format depended on rushed segments which pitted one host’s poorly-explained preferences against another’s; now, even a seemingly negligible amount of additional interviews/gabbing gives TMS an actual shot at resonant entertainment. Impossible before now were particularly inspired production moves like the booking of Tesla’s Jeff Keith (so smiley!) and Frank Hannon on the same episode as Testament’s Chuck Billy (above). If VH1 brass has any brains, they’ll holiday bonus the shit outta whomever was responsible for pairing these superficially different but geographically and alphabetically neighborly acts. It’s TV gold! Watch here and you’ll see that the two camps endorse the same sports team, play the same clubs, and share members (!). Best of all, Billy expounds on the fun CD-shopping quirk that sorta cosmically partners similarly-named bands, i.e. you have to go through the Tesla section to reach Testament. (And through The Cult to get to Curve, and, by design, through Megadeth to Metallica.) This stuff might seem like filler or minutiae, but priceless spontaneity and shared giggle sessions are the key to entertaining talk programming. Now all they have to do is replace host/Howard Stern wannabe Jim Florentine with an at-large correspondent who focuses weekly remotes on, oh, bands formed after 1983 maybe? I know just the dude!

-ADF

That Metal Show premieres new episodes Saturdays on VH1 Classic. View full episodes here.

Last week, Dave Mustaine said that Anthrax might play some dates on the upcoming American Carnage tour with Megadeth and Slayer, and I got all excited because the idea of a Slayer/Megadeth/Anthrax/Testament line-up seemed even more appealing to me than the idea of a Metallica/Slayer/Megadeth/Anthrax line-up (y’know, ’cause Metallica sucks now). What I never even considered, though, was that there might be an entire second leg of the tour, and that Testament might not even be on said leg.

Which seems to be exactly what has happened – a whole bunch of dates with Slegadethrax have been announced, but the press release we received makes no mention of Testament. Which means that either a) someone fucked up or b) Testament aren’t on this leg of the tour (more likely). Which kinda sucks. I mean, Megadeth/Slayer/Anthrax is swell and all, but not as cool as tossing Testament in there, too.

Of course, I’m really complaining about an embarrassment of riches, so fuck me, I guess. Slayer will continue to play all of Seasons in the Abyss on this leg of the tour, and Megadeth will continue to play all of Rust in Peace, so if seeing Anthrax appeals to you more than seeing Testament, well… I suppose that, theoretically, you won’t be missing anything. Except Chuck Billy’s beautiful, beautiful punam.

Dates after the jump.

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West Coast be damned, I’ll be mighty disappointed if Devin “Poopy McNuggeteer” Towsend doesn’t end up announcing East Coast dates for his October U.S. tour. But whether he does or does not, it seems fairly certain that we won’t be treated to a special performance of Ziltoid in its entirety the way our Finnish compadres at the Tuska Open Air Metal Festival were. And even if the power of the skullet — now the hairdo of choice of the mighty Ziltoid himself — by some miraculous intervention decides to bestow the entirety of the Ziltoid album upon us, there’s no way Testament’s Chuck Fucking Billy will come out to do guest vocals as the Planet Smasher character on the song “Planet Smasher.” And hot damn, does Billy sound scarier than ever or what?

But hey, if that happened that’d really be something. Regardless, we’re pretty sure any Devin Townsend set brought east will tickle our testicles just fine.

-VN

Thanks: TNOTB

Yep, we talked a lot of smack on Joey Belladonna this week, much to the chagrin of, well, an awful lot of you. I think we’re done for a little while… but I can’t make any promises. Our job at MetalSucks is to amuse ourselves first and foremost, and, well, we thought it was pretty damned funny. So ppppfffftttt.

Here’s what else went down this week:

• We debuted the title track from Nachtmystium’s new album, Addicts.
• Genetic’s Dallas Coyle called us “influential,” Disfear’s Tomas Lindberg shared some Maryland Deathfest memories, The Austerity Program’s Justin Foley unveiled his top four Taco Riffs, Cynic’s Paul Masvidal got burglarized, As I Lay Dying’s Nick Hipa made some new revelations about L O S T, God Forbid’s Doc Coyle worried about turning into an old geezer, Daath’s Eyal Levi gave us a lesson in stage etiquette, and Batillus’ Geoff Summers gave us a new studio update.
• We spoke to The Melvins’ Buzz Osborne, Periphery’s Misha “Bulb” Mansoor, Testament’s Chuck Billy, and Sick of it All’s Lou Koller.
• We checked out new releases by Korn and Ufomammut and Year of No Light.
• Is Mastodon’s Brent Hinds a Mastodick?
• Sergeant D sez Cunthunt777 are your new favorite band.
• Don’t worry, baby, Dr. Danzig gonna cure what ails you.
• Hot chick loves Nergal, hates the Bible.
• Boy oh boy, do we love the new Limp Bizkit cover art!
• If you’re looking for new band members, don’t do this.

Alright. We’re gonna go get drunk and crank We’ve Come For You All in John Bush’s honor. Have a great weekend, everyone.

-AR

In a way, Testament is like The Small Faces to Metallica’s Beatles and Slayer’s Rolling Stones: a band as virtuosic, productive, and creatively astute as their deified peers, but hamstrung by bad business breaks. Another factor is the absence of an outspoken know-it-all (Slayer, Metallica), a gimmicky mascot (Anthrax), or a Mustaine-esque diva (duh) to which Testament’s marketing efforts could be anchored. Aside from singer Chuck Billy’s serious illness a decade ago, the Testament story’s most noteworthy turns include little more than the defection of a jazz-crazy guitarist and a dickish but minor betrayal by metal’s most corpulent drummer.

Even if a hypothetical Testament: Behind The Music would clock in at about six minutes, an All-Star Tribute To Testament concert event could stretch across days to cover just the highlights of their dudless catalogue. (My personal best-of runs 175 minutes. Yeah baby.) And while the band is enjoying what guitarist Eric Peterson calls “a second wind” since the return of uber-guitarist Alex Skolnick and bassist Greg Peterson for the magnificent 2008 outing The Formation of Damnation, Testament remains supplicant to sexier tourmates Slayer and Megadeth in the opening slot on this summer’s rescheduled American Carnage Tour. That seems fine by the surprisingly affable (and occasionally merry) Chuck Billy, who spoke exclusively to MetalSucks about getting hammered in Europe, how Dave Lombardo’s enabled the awesomeness of The Gathering, the quest to control their back catalogue, and their exciting-as-fuck new setlist. Emphasis on “new.”

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Is there a consensus on which Testament album is their best? Do they have a Reign in Blood or Among the Living, an album where (almost) everyone just kinda goes “Oh, yeah, that’s their best album.” I don’t think so. I kinda think they’re more of a Megadeth-type sitution, where a lot of people say Rust bot a lotta people say Peace Sells and they’re both kinda right. I think with Testament, you can go The Legacy or The New Order or Practice What You Preach and make a pretty fair argument in all instances.

Which is my very roundabout way of telling you that Testament are going to be playing The Legacy live, in its entirety, on their upcoming tour with Slayer and Megadeth, which is called the American Carnage Tour but should really just be called The Big Three or some shit (And P.S., fuck you if you argue that Testament can’t be one third of a Big Three tour. They’re fucking Testament, not Attitude Adjustment.)

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Metal fans, let’s take a collective moment to consider ourselves blessed with some big Peters. Peters who will take you firmly from both sides of the mixing board with confidence and expertise. Sweaty, bulging-veined Peters whose live shows leave willing multitudes spent, sated, slack – and more than a bit bruised. These Peters, thanks to generous endowments of talent, stand fully erect as superstars in real metal. Each of metal’s hugest Peters share a rock hard work ethic, hardly pausing for rest between releases captured on tape and performances in the flesh, after which they simply move on to violate again in another city.

For the second installment of MetalSucks’ Metal’s Biggest Peters, I phoned Testament’s Eric Peterson, for whom I had no fewer than ten-thousand questions. But Peterson is busy building the next classic Testament record and preparing for the Slayer/Megadeth-headlined American Carnage tour – or, simply, the Slaygadethstament Tour – so I’d have to wait for another day to press him about producers Tony Platt and GGGarth Richardson; nor would we discuss Slayer drummer Dave Lombardo’s career performance on The Gathering, the record that re-launched Testament as a metal juggernaut; neither was there an opportunity to probe Peterson’s feelings on the infiltration of Testament by an unapologetic jazz devotee in godly guitarist Alex Skolnick; and I’d have to refrain from following-up on his passing mentions of good new music and jerkface Dave Mustaine. Still, the genial and passionate Peterson opened up about the diplomacy required to lead a metal band, Testament’s surprising new setlist, the potential for blastbeats on the follow-up to 2008’s triumphant The Formation of Damnation, and his surefire plan to improve the disaster movie 2012.

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Oftentimes, writers tend to fall in love with their own words and florid descriptions. I try to avoid this in my true crime books as I believe the stories themselves propel the tale along.

In music criticism, it’s even worse.

Who can come up with the most br00tal analogies or the wittiest put-downs or the sickest comparisons usually takes precedence over simply writing a straight-forward review of what the writer has just listened to or witnessed? Sometimes it’s not necessary to go into an overly detailed historical analysis of metal or an attempt to make a sociological connection between the music and its fans. I’m sure I’ve fallen prey to pedantic verboseness at times. But, hey, sometimes, it’s just better to tell the readers that “shit sucks” or “shit’s great.”

That being said, Testament and Lazarus A.D. fall into the “shit’s great” category, while Unearth falls into the “shit sucks” category.

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The big frickin’ deal week before last was Metallica’s induction into the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame in Cleveland. Last week, the focus of the Metal community’s honor is Metallica’s Lucifer, Dave Mustaine, at The Epiphone Honda Fury Revolver Magazine Golden Gods Awards. Anti-Metallica sentiment was aired freely and to shouts of encore! The name of Mustaine’s band was chanted pretty much all night (poor Atreyu guy). The event went down at Club Nokia in downtown L.A. on Tuesday night hosted by Rodrigo from Mr. Show (Brian Posehn). Honestly? It was pretty awkward and not very Metal. A ton of Metal people were there, mostly ticket buyers. The vibe started a bit chilly outside the venue, then spiked at Killswitch Engage and Maynard James Keenan (not together) before a nosedive from which even Megadeth could not recover. I had a GREAT TIME! Photos by Adam Haussman.

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