TEN RANDOM HAIR METAL SONGS THAT I REALLY LOVE
Writing about L.A. Guns earlier got me thinking about hair metal songs I really like, some of which are by bands I don’t think should be classified as hair metal but are anyway. So, like, here are some songs I was listening to, if you wanna listen to ’em, too:
L.A. GUNS, “NOTHING BETTER TO DO”
Fun fact: Bassist Kelly Nickels handles lead vocals on this song.
CINDERELLA, “SHELTER ME”
Fun question to ponder: How the fuck is this considered hair metal? It sounds like Axl Rose singing vocals over The Black Crowes. Holy shit, this song is catchy as fuck.
TWISTED SISTER, “BURN IN HELL”
Fun common misconception: Dark Shadows was not based on Tim Burton’s time directing Dee Snider.
POISON, “BRING IT HOME”
Fun inarguable assertion: Guitarist Richie Kotzen, who replaced cokedouche C.C. Deville for the album Native Tongue only, is a better singer than Bret Michaels. Check out his pipes on that chorus… holy crap!
MOTLEY CRUE, “MISUNDERSTOOD”
Fun thing to remember while driving drunk in Vegas: Motley Crue have made nine albums. The one is John Corabi is better than at least three and possibly four of the others.
VINCE NEIL, “SISTER OF PAIN”
Fun thing to remember while just edging out a living as the dude who replaced Vince Neil for that one Motley Crue album: Steve Stevens may be 110% responsible for the last great Motley Crue album to feature Vince Neil on vocals. Even though it didn’t feature the other three members of Motley Crue. I mean, that may be the third most epic guitar solo of all time.
SKID ROW, “BEAT YOURSELF BLIND”
Fun fuck else can you say about a band with one Canadian and four dudes from New Jersey: If the part where the second guitar kicks in at 1:23 were written by Dime, you’d masturbate to it constantly.
SEBASTIAN BACH, “COUNTERPUNCH”
Fun gee I wonder what he was singing about: Yeah it’s the break-up of Skid Row. Funny enough, Skid Row haven’t written a Skid Row song this good in years.
DEF LEPPARD, “PAPER SUN”
Fun one armed wife beater: Yup, I went there! If Euphoria was the album Def Leppard had made instead of Slang, I might make fun of them at least 3.43% of the time. I think Metallica stole the part at 2:53 for at least one Death Magnetic riff.
JANET JACKSON, “BLACK CAT”
Fun wait what?: Wait, what?