Editorials

Attila’s Chris Fronzak Has Advice on How to Become a Millionaire Like Him

0
These clowns earn way more money than you.
These clowns earn way more money than you.

As much disdain as we may harbor for Attila and other bands of their ilk, I’ll hand it to Chris Fronzak and co. for how they’ve managed to conduct their business and become a mega-popular band. At this point the entire Attila operation comes off as highly calculated and precise, a well-oiled machine; they know exactly what they’re doing, how to interact with their fans, how to get press, how to inspire maximum stangriness from IMNs, etc. So while our initial coverage of Attila way back when was most certainly vitriolic, at some point along the way I kinda stopped caring; Attila know who their market is, we know ours, and we’re both kinda complicit in the whole snobby-bloggers-attack-gimmicky-scene-band arrangement.

All the above is a long-winded way of saying that when Chris Fronzak talks about how to make money as a band, you should probably listen, as silly as that may seem. And that’s exactly what he did in an interview posted on Lambgoat this morning. I may think the guy’s an idiot and that his music sucks, but clearly he’s doing something right on the business side. Here’s an excerpt:

It’s hard not to notice on Twitter your fondness for fine automobiles. I also saw that you’re building an eight-bedroom house. Your band is popular, but I can’t imagine you’re making that much money from Attila. It’s not like you guys are selling out 5,000 venues. Seriously, where does this loot come from? Stay Sick? I’ve seen online commenters suggest that your parents are well-off… others have suggested that you’re going deeply into debt just to impress people. Please set the record straight.

Hahaha, the rumors, yes. Finally, I can set the record straight. NO- I do not have a rich family that gives me money (quite the opposite). NO- I didn’t win the lottery (I wish!) NO- I’m not going into debt to have nice things (I’m way too smart for that). The answer is a combination effort.

For one, Attila does make decent money. It’s not that we’re making THAT MUCH MORE than other bands, but rather because we’re EXTREMELY smart about what we do with our money. Most bands are fucking retarded when it comes to money management. We are very strategic about how we budget our tours and where we choose to spend our money.

I see bands that make the same amount as us walk away from a tour with NOTHING. Why? Because they wanted to by $25,000 in ear monitors, a $20,000 sound board, a $50,000 light setup, $25,000 in guitars, $50,000 in stage production, $5,000 in weed, $2,000 in booze, and drive in 2 buses instead of one. Is it necessary to spend all of that? Of course not. We are very skilled at money management; we set up strict budget sheets, we pay all bills on time, and we NEVER carry a debt. It pays to be smart.

As for me as an individual, I have multiple sources of income. You can hate me all you want, but you can’t deny the fact that I’m a pretty smart individual. My high school GPA was so high at my time of graduation that I was offered a free scholarship to ANY college in Georgia. I turned it down because I wanted to travel the world and scream obscenities (much more fun than college).

I don’t want to give away all of my secrets, but the average millionaire has 7 sources of income. If you rely on just ONE source to make money, you’re limiting yourself. You also need to figure out a way to make money while you sleep. Being in a band is tough, it’s not like the 90’s where I would be getting multi-million dollar royalty checks. I don’t make SHIT off CD sales, no one does. But I’m not the type of person to bitch and complain, in fact, I NEVER complain. I just stay positive and adapt.

How do I make so much money? To be completely honest, I just work my ass off. I’m passionate about what I do so therefore I don’t take days off. I worked on Christmas, and I worked on New Years. Did I get drunk? Nope. Do I feel good? Hell yeah.

Makes a whole lot of sense, doesn’t it? I love the brashness of proclaiming that he’s making money while he sleeps every night and his flippant dismissal of college scholarship offers. I also love the implication (true or not) that Fronzak is a literal millionaire. If the members of Attila were indeed able to make that much money from their band, that is some highly successfully Grand Wizard-level trolling and a big “fuck you” to “true metal” culture right there… props!

The rest of the interview is pretty interesting too; read it here.

Show Comments
Metal Sucks Greatest Hits