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Ozzy Installs Bat Conservation Boxes at UK Home, Bats Understandably Cautious

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There are many things for which heavy metal legend Ozzy Osbourne is known, but one of the major ones is biting the head off of a bat at a 1982 show in Des Moines, Iowa. Since then, the bat has become a trademark of Ozzy’s branding; his ill-fated crypto project was called CryptoBatz, and his new music video even contains a scene in which a giant bat bites his head off. Now, Ozzy seems to have warmed up to the animals themselves, as he’s apparently installing bat houses at his new home — though one can imagine that the bats aren’t exactly super excited about this.

Yup, according to UK tabloid The Mirror, Ozzy will install bat boxes at his UK home. These snack packs animal houses will ensure tasty winged treats on the go that these protected animals are given a chance to flourish around Ozzy’s stomach estate, and further cement that Ozzy doesn’t want to stop at the head is now a friend of bats rather than their enemy.

As readers of MetalSucks for these past few months know, I am an avid lover of all things vampiric, and bats are definitely part of that. So I’m happy Ozzy is aiding these animals, who got a bad rap for “starting COVID” when it was actually jet-setting rich people who really launched the pandemic.

My note to Ozzy is to double-check which type of bat houses he’s buying, as some are actually dangerous to bats. Ozzy should consult with Merlin Tuttle, the world’s foremost bat biologist, who saved Austin, Texas’ Congress Avenue Bridge bat roost from extermination, thus turning Austin into the official ‘Bat City.’

ANYway, cheers to Ozzy for helping one of metal’s most important animal species. Meanwhile, Ozzy’s new record Patient Number 9 drops September 9th — hey, 9 on 9/9! Cool, like an inverted 666! — and is available for preorder. Check out details below, followed by the title track.

Ozzy Osbourne’s Patient Number 9:

1. Patient Number 9 (feat. Jeff Beck)
2. Immortal (feat. Mike McCready)
3. Parasite (feat. Zakk Wylde)
4. Mr. Darkness (feat. Zakk Wylde)
5. One of Those Days (feat. Eric Clapton)
6. A Thousand Shades (feat. Jeff Beck)
7. No Escape From Now (feat. Tony Iommi)
8. Nothing Feels Right (feat. Zakk Wylde)
9. Evil Shuffle (feat. Zakk Wylde)
10. Degradation Rules (feat. Tony Iommi)
11. Dead and Gone
12. God Only Knows
13. Darkside Blues

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