Pummeling Politics

The Metallica guitarist is fired up after Trump’s inauguration.

“I… am… IRON TAN!”

The Smashing Pumpkins singer had embarked upon a 30-day trip to document “the American culture” he grew up with.

In an official job posting, Spotify seeks someone “Familiar with the Spotify platform, with experience in programming playlists at a federal level. Anything from an eclectic summer playlist, to a celebratory, “I just found my birth certificate” playlist.”

“The guy is a liar and corrupt. He has really screwed a lot of people in his lifetime and I think he’s gonna do a lot of bad stuff.”

“I love Bill O’Reilly’s outlook on life. He kind of plays it right up the middle.” Um, WHAT?!?!?!

The Metallica guitarist is trying to remain positive in light of all the negative.

“This type of hate should not be tolerated in our community,” says the venerated label.

“They are defending a guy that they don’t know and who really doesn’t give a fuck about them,” says Cazares.

“If anything happens that I’m not okay with, I’m going to be super vocal about it for the first time in my life.”

What an asshole.

“I think when you’re left with him or Killary, you have to go with… I would have voted for Satan over her.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever willfully had a political conversation with him.”

THAT BASTARD!

Axl Rose is on a roll!

“I saw rifles, grenade launchers, safety-orange shotguns, large pepper-spray canisters resembling fire extinguishers and a few water hoses that were rolled out.”

THEIR LYRICS ARE SATATIC, THEY LOVE PIZZA AND THEY MOLEST CHILDREN!!!! DEEERRRRRRRRPPPPP

Read what Blythe’s trip to protest the Dakota Access Pipeline was like.

“So give us all your faggots, all your niggers and your spicks
Give us all your muslims, the so-called terrorists
We welcome them with open arms, put ‘em in our mix
We’re better off together, embrace our difference”

Not surprising, still great.