MetalSucks

From a Rhythm magazine interview with Dave Lombardo that I saw on Blabbermouth:

Rhythm: Playing with METALLICA at Download in 2004 must have been quite an experience.

Lombardo: “Yeah. Show ‘em how it’s done! No disrespect to Lars [Ulrich], because Lars is great and he’s a very nice guy, but he needs to spend a week at my house and we need to sit down and play. I could show him — ‘No, Lars, like this!’… ‘Let’s chill, let’s relax, have some coffee and let’s play!’ Hahahahaha!”

If you’ve ever seen/heard this show, then you’re already aware that Lombardo ain’t dicking around – he and Joey Jordison both made Metallica sound at least 95% better (alas, Hetfield still insists on using those honky-tonk “wom-ahn” vocals he’s become so fond of). Check it out:

And while we’re on the topic, here’s Jordison playing with the band:

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I have no idea what made me think of them – maybe I saw a tranny in the Village or something, or maybe it was just writing about Dope, since half the members of Murderdolls started in Dope and then there was a ridiculous flame war between the two bands. But, uh, somehow they popped in my mind.

We all know what Joey Jordison is up to, and Blabbermouth tells me that Wednesday 13 still has something resembling a career. I see Acey Slade walking around the neighborhood sometimes, so I guess he’s still DJing at Don Hill’s or some shit. Actually, that guy used to spin pretty good, if you were in the mood for hair metal and 70s rawk. I have no idea what happened to the other d00ds in this band, though. In fact, I don’t even know what their names are.

I’d still rather listen to this than post-Feelgood Motley Crue. Or most Stone Sour, for that matter. If for some reason those were my only choices. I can’t imagine any scenario in which that happened, but, hey.

-AR

Let the haters hate: Slipknot are a good band, and, more than that, they’re a good band that has show substantial growth from album to album – and their most recent release, All Hope is Gone, is no exception. Sonically, the record is something of a codification of everything the band has ever done, which means the Stone Sourisms (clean vocals, reasonably radio-friendly alt-rock anthems, moody power ballads, etc.) of Vol. 3: The Subliminal Verses are here once again. Whether or not that’s a good thing, ultimately, will depend solely on the tastes of the listener.

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Hey, did you know that there’s a Slipknot cover band called “Tonkpils” (which is just “Slipknot” spelled backwards)? It’s weird, but true. Go figure.

ANYWAY, Slipknot unveiled their new masks at 12:01 am last night (actually, that’s bullshit – it was more like 1 a.m. EST). Now, a pattern has emerged over the years with regards to these dudes and their masks: some of them do major variations on a theme from mask to mask, and some just pretty much stick to the same thing every time. The differences between incarnations of Jim Root and Mick Thompson’s masks, for example, are negligible, while Corey Taylor and Shawn “Clown” Crahan obviously like to get jiggy wit it.

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The latest Blabbermouth [via Rock N Roll Experience] news sure to cause an uproar: Burton Bell just gave an interview where he calls Deftones front man Chino Moreno “a dick,” Slipknot’s Joey Jordison a “sloppy” drummer, and asserts that the last few Ozzy albums have been full of “shitty music.”

And, hey, you know what? Horns up to Bell for being honest. Because while I don’t think Jordison is a sloppy drummer and I don’t know Chino well enough to classify him as a dick or otherwise, but Ozzy certainly has been making shitty music for at least three studio albums now. And why the fuck should we fault Bell for speaking his mind? It’s better than the usual being diplomatic bull crap.

Ironically enough, the last time I remember someone this prominent in the metal world really speaking out like this was Chino’s infamous Revolver interview in the summer of ‘03, when he slagged every band he was about to hit the road with for that year’s Summer Sanitarium tour (including Metallica). What goes around comes around, I s’pose…

-AR

By and large I think that re-mix albums are a total waste of time; only once in a blue moon does anyone manage to come up with anything interesting (or, at least, more interesting than the original track), so they often seem like cash-ins in the vein of “expanded edition” re-releases.

So I am in no way optimistic that Maynard James Keenan has announced an April 29 release of V is for Viagra: The Vagina Remixes, a remix collection (duh) of the songs from V is for Vagina, last year’s Puscifer album. A lot of the participants on the release will be the usual suspect for this sort of Nine Inch Nails-ish affair – former NIN member Danny Lohner, Dave Ogilvie, Telefon Tel Aviv’s Josh Eustis, etc. – but, oddly enough, Slipknot drummer Joey Jordison will also have a track, as will Aaron Turner from Isis and the infamous ambient force known as Lustmord. Which is actually very encouraging.

In any case, I guess we’ll get to find out if this particular release can rise above the usual remix shenanigans next month.

-AR