Editorials 350 CH-CH-CH-CHANGES: WHY BANDS YOU LIKE START SUCKING: PART 3 OF 6: INSPIRATION MASTURBATION (A.K.A. “ROOFTOP SYNDROME”) October 18th, 2011 at 4:00pm MetalSucks Alright, I’ll admit it: I’m a lazy guy. I’m the […]
Hipsters Out Of Metal! 190 VAN HALEN: WELCOME TO BONER COUNTRY, POP. MARK TREMONTI July 5th, 2011 at 3:20pm Anso DF Van Halen, featuring the young squire Van Halen (left); Mark […]
Worst Week Ever 0 IN WHICH WE TRIED FOUR LOKO FOR THE FIRST AND LAST TIME December 3rd, 2010 at 4:30pm Axl Rosenberg At least, it was my last time. I feel like […]
Green Eggs and Slam 2110 WHAT IS UR FAVORITE HARD ROCK BAND??? November 8th, 2010 at 1:20pm Sergeant D There’s nothing I love more than the cock-smashing brutality of […]
F-F-F-Feudin' 470 SCHMUCKY ERNA CAN’T EVEN APOLOGIZE RIGHT October 29th, 2010 at 1:20pm Axl Rosenberg Hey, remember a couple of weeks ago when Schmucky Erna […]
New Stuff 150 LOOK, AXL SAID SOMETHING NICE ABOUT ALTER BRIDGE! October 7th, 2010 at 12:00pm Axl Rosenberg Speaking of Slash: Vince and I caught his solo tour […]
Upcoming Bullsh*t 310 DAVE GROHL, CHRIS CORNELL TO HELP SLASH MOUTH RAPE HIS LEGACY November 11th, 2009 at 10:30am Axl Rosenberg The Starbucks Incident Yes, I am going to continue to […]
Laugh At Others' Misfortunes 370 GOT SIX BUCKS AND AN EVENING TO COMPLETELY WASTE? GO SEE CREED November 2nd, 2009 at 11:30am Axl Rosenberg Every now and then, something happens to make me feel […]
...And F*ck You Too 610 “HERE’S CREED WITH ‘RAPE!'” October 28th, 2009 at 5:00pm Axl Rosenberg Of course that’s not what Regis actually says when he […]
Reunion Mania 450 MYLES KENNEDY’S* NO-BULLSH*T TAKE ON THE CREED REUNION (*AKA OURS) April 29th, 2009 at 9:55am Vince Neilstein Fresh off the heels of the announcement that Creed will […]
Reunion Mania 160 THE CREED REUNION IS REALLY HAPPENING March 18th, 2009 at 10:07am Axl Rosenberg Now I have no choice but to kill Scott Stapp’s […]
What the...?? 200 METALHEADS ARE SUPREMELY F*CKED UP, DUDE December 4th, 2008 at 11:00am Vince Neilstein Exhibit A: During the two-day black metal festival “Nidarosian Black […]
Rampant Rumors 370 “IF CREED REUNITES, BLAME LED ZEPPELIN” November 3rd, 2008 at 2:00pm Vince Neilstein The Webernet rumor mill has been aflutter in recent weeks […]
Lolz 0 Scare Tactics: Was Obama BORN IN FINLAND?!?!?!?! May 16th, 2016 at 4:30pm Emperor Rhombus Nice try, Barack KUOPPALA Obama.
Necessary Roughness 260 UNNECESSARY ROUGHNESS WITH THE RED CHORD’S GREG WEEKS: LEWIS AND POLAMALU BATTLE IT OUT FOR SHOWER PRODUCTS, ORTON IS STILL WEIRD LOOKING, AND SEVENDUST AND THE FALCONS ARE “ON TOP” December 6th, 2010 at 4:30pm MetalSucks So, I’m giving you guys an open invite to my […]
Worst Week Ever 1 IN WHICH WE DID IT ALL FOR THE LOVE OF SLAYER October 15th, 2010 at 5:00pm Axl Rosenberg Seriously, if you haven’t read Vince’s epic story about how […]
Readers' Choice 720 SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN TO ME WHY I SHOULD BE NICE TO ALTER BRIDGE November 11th, 2009 at 2:30pm Axl Rosenberg Seriously. Because every time Vince or I make a snarky […]